TKP FANTASY FOOTBALL - WEEK 10

Instead of being sad about missing out on Jalen Dalton, you can come here and be sad about your fantasy team instead!

3 more weeks until the playoffs. In case you havent been paying attention, heres how theyll work:

Top 4 make the playoffs. Week 14 pits the 1 seeds vs. the 4 seeds and the 2 seeds vs. the 3 seeds. The winners of the Week 14 matchups face each other for their Conference Championship in week 15.

Thats when the fun begins the three Conference Champions will face off in a two week battle between weeks 16 and 17. I will compute the stats by hand. Week 16 will have standard league scoring (Frank Beamer conference and Sam Rogers conference scoring) and Week 17 will have 0.5 PPR scoring (Bud Foster scoring scoring).

Because this system lacks flexibility (has to be done over email), Ill be the one to be flexible. For week 16, you must email me (sean(dot)t(dot)hogan(at)gmail(dot)com) 1 hour before games start on a given day if you intend to start a player and you must tell me which position theyre starting in (QB, RB1, RB2, WR1, WR2, TE, FLEX, DST, K). Week 16 is tricky because there are Thursday and Saturday games, so youll need to email me by 7:30 on Thursday if you have any players playing then and an hour before the start of the Saturday and Sunday games for your players playing on those days. If you do not get a lineup in, I will default to your lineup the previous week completely, even if a player is benched, injured, etc., so please remember to get your lineups in. I will accept as many lineup revisions as you need up until 5 minutes before a players game starts, but please try and get them in earlier when possible.

I heard through the grapevine that the winner will even get some free TKP swag!

Frank Beamer Conference

WHATS COOKIN GOOD LOOKIN?
Johnny Manzeitgeist (8-2, 3rd in points) has been the best team in the league over the last 4 weeks, averaging a cool 105.75 points per game and going 4-0 (and won 7 in a row). Scobeard faces two other hot teams in weeks 11 and 12 (Demaryius Targaryen and Team Griffindor) and has the third hardest remaining schedule (average opponent PR of 111.06), but would have to either lose 2 of the last 3 and lose a points tiebreaker to Turn Down For Watt or lose the last 3 altogether to miss the playoffs.

Centaurrian Gray (7-3, 1st in points) was looking good, battling for 1st with Danibails for many weeks. Now I find myself in second, but barely holding onto my points scored tiebreaker, struggling mightily over the past four weeks (2-2, average score of 86.5). Two wins should get me in, but with the fourth hardest schedule remaining (average opponent PR of 110.27) will make that difficult. A week 11 win over Turn Down For Watt would increase everyone in the top 4s playoff chances, as CharlesK is the only 6-4 team. Too bad DeMarco Murray is on bye for me this week.

Demaryius Targaryen (7-3, 4th in points)
Another #sohotrightnow team, The Fighting Gobblers squad have won 6 straight, averaging 94.25 points per week over the last four. Their remaining schedule looks middle-of-the-road (#6 toughest schedule at 106.78 remaining opponent PR), but thats largely due to facing Team Cody w/ a C in week 12; in weeks 11 and 13, they face first place Johnny Manzeitgeist and Turn Down For Watt, respectively.

Team danibailsdeep (7-3, 6th in points)
After facing team Cody w/ a C in week 11, Danibails will have a chance to create her own playoff situation in weeks 12 and 13, as she faces Turn Down For Watt and myself. Two wins could vault her up to first or second place, while two losses could knock her out of the playoffs entirely. Splitting those games should git-r-done for her, assuming she can get through Cody w/ a C this week.

SO YOURE TELLING ME THERES A CHANCE?
Turn Down For Watt (6-4, 7th in points)
CharlesK has his work cut out for him, but at least controls his own destiny. While hes only 7th in points, hes within striking range of pretty much everyone ahead of him, and faces the numbers 2, 3 and 4 teams in the standings over the last three weeks. 2 wins are an absolute must, but 3 would be nice. If They can win two, the Centaurrian Gray-Daniballsdeep Week 13 matchup may be the most important game of the season to Turn Down For Watt, and theyre not even playing in it.
Vick In A Box (5-5, 5th in points)
Phillyhokie007 went 2-1 over the last 3 weeks against some upper echelon teams (Turn Down For Watt, Daniballsdeep and Demaryius Targaryen). They have 3 left against .500ish teams in Griffindor, Morton and Treadmill Horses. They have a good chance to win at least 2, but 7-6 is probably not going to be enough to make the playoffs. 3 wins are an absolute must, and Griffindor is the second hottest team in the league right now.

AH-AH-AH-AH-BARELY ALIVE!
Treadmill Horses (5-5, 8th in points)
Macraw83 has the easiest remaining schedule, facing two of the three bottom teams in The BeLealver and BeerMe Egbert. Who knows, maybe the Vick In A Box vs Treadmill Horses matchup in week 13 could be for a playoff spot. Treadmill Horses are in a worse spot than Vick In A Box because theyre fairly far back of the teams in front of them for the points scored tiebreak, but a 3-0 finish paired with a 1-2 finish from one of the 7-3 teams could make things interesting enough.

Team Griffindor (4-5-1, 2nd in points)
Too little too late for RealDiehl, who is 3 points out of the lead in points but couldnt get out of the gates, losing 2 games where he scored 97 points and another where he scored 90. Making the playoffs would require finishing 3-0 with a 7-3 team finishing 0-2-1 or worse over their last three (and none of the 6-4/5-5 teams leapfrogging them). Possible, but not likely. That week 2 tie to Team Cody w/ a C hurts.

Team Morton (4-6, 10th in points)
The only way they can make the playoffs is if one of the 7-3 teams loses their last 3, none of the 6-4/5-5 teams end up with 8 wins, and they win the points tiebreak. Probably not gonna happen, but they can play spoiler with remaining games vs. Vick In A Box and Johnny Manzeitgeist!

SOUVLAKI FOOTBALL GRAVEYARD DOT PNG
The BeLealver (3-7, 9th in points)
Well, at least they outlasted Mark Leals season before being eliminated.

BeerMe Egbert (2-8, 11th in points)
After a 2-0 start, this team went on an 8 week Bender. GET IT?!? FUTURAMA JOKES ANYONE?!?

Team Cody w/ a C (1-8-1, 12th in points)
More like Team Cody w/ a bunch of Ls.

Bud Foster Conference


Denied Pussy Touchdown (9-1, 1st in points)
Vick In A Box (8-2, 2nd in points)
Cajun Graham-Balaya (7-3, 3rd in points)
Seriously, guys. Just dont fuck it up. Top 3 teams in the league, top 3 points scored in the league, top 3 average points scored over the last 4 weeks, top 3 record over the last 4 weeks. Denied Pussy Touchdown and Cajun Graham-balaya face the two toughest schedules from here on out (average opponent PRs of 132.72 and 130.52, respectively) while Vick In A Box has the easiest remaining at 120.07. I think theyll finish in this order.

Holy crap. 9 teams within 2 games of each other with 3 weeks to go.
Houston Swedish Chef (5-5, 4th in points)
The leader in the clubhouse. Out of the teams still in the running, they have the most points, the second most points over the last 4 weeks and the second easiest schedule. The week 12 matchup against Vick In A Box will be tough, but they face 3rd in 31 (8th in points) and Ticket Oak (last in points) in weeks 11 and 13, so theyre in the catbird seat here.

Fosters D gets after ya (5-5, 5th in points)
If Houston Swedish Chef doesnt lock up the #4 seed, my money is on Fosters D. theyre just barely behind Houston Swedish Chef in points and have scored the most out of the six teams still in the running for 4th place over the last 4 weeks. They have a relatively tough remaining schedule, as they face Dork Magic (6th in points) in week 11 and Denied Pussy Touchdown (1st in points) in week 13. That week 13 matchup could very well be a first round playoff matchup. Who wouldnt want to face the 9-1 1st place team two weeks in a row?

Ticket Oak (5-5, 12th in points)
Ticket Oak needs to outpace Houston Swedish Chef and Fosters D, as they cant afford a tie (over 200 points behind the two in the tiebreak). They do avoid the top three teams over the next three weeks, so its possible they can win out, but Im not betting on it.

Highty Tighty Phoenix (4-5-1, 7th in points)
Highty Tighty Phoenix has the most ability to screw with this group of 6, as they face off against Ticket Oak and Kuhn on the Cobb. Theyll need to win at least 2 of their last 3, but potentially all three.

Dork Magic (4-6, 6th in points)
Its gonna be tough, as they face Vick In A Box, Fosters D and 3rd and 31, but they are within striking range of Houston Swedish Chef and Fosters D points-wise if they can force a tiebreak.

Kuhn on the Cobb (4-6, 9th in points)
Theyre still in the thick of things, but they might need to win out to make it; they are just far enough behind everyone points-wise that I dont think they can win a tiebreak (barring three awesome weeks). They have been hot recently, scoring an average of 103.13 points over the last 4 weeks, so its not over.

Roccos Italian Army (3-6-1, 11th in points)
The Royal Italian Army was one of the pioneers in the use of paratroopers in WWII. Roccos team played like a paratrooper without a parachute from weeks 6 through 9, going 0-4 and knocking themselves out of the playoff hunt.
3rd and 31 (3-7, 8th in points)

Jhnbrynt does not have Tyrod, therefore did not convert on 3rd and 31 and the season was punted.

Cartoons Plural (2-8, 10th in points)
When the games were Key, they got Peeled.

Sam Rogers Conference

WIN AND YOURE IN
Doges Plural (8-2, 3rd in points)
So first. Very playoffs. Much Doges.

Carolina Sex Panthers (7-3, 1st in points)
2 tough games against Bourbon BeamerBudBrewer and Whigs and Torreys, and then a week 13 matchup against FranklyIncensed. Should be fine.

Team Powers Mojo (7-3, 5th in points)
Matchups with the #s 10 and 11 teams in the league and then the #1. Should probably also be fine.

WIN AGAINST THE TEAM YOU'RE TIED WITH AND YOURE PROBABLY IN
Bourbon BeamerBudBrewer (6-4, 2nd in points) and Sarah Stone DD Here for the TDs (6-4, 4th in points) will meet in week 13. The winner will probably be the #4 playoff seed. PLAYOFFS A WEEK EARLY ISNT THIS GREAT?!?

LONGER SHOT THAN LES HENSON IN 1980

Megatrons Johnson (5-5, 7th in points)
I guess in order to face the best in the playoffs, you have to beat the best. Megatrons Johnson faces Doges Plural, Bourbon BeamerBudBrewer and Whigs and Torreys over the last 3 weeks. 3 wins should get them in, but 3 wins would also be really hard to do.

Whigs and Torreys (5-5, 10th in points) and Fuller Up (5-5, 11th in points) arent going to win tiebreaks with anyone else (besides each other), but the winner of their week 11 matchup will still be in the thick of things. The loser is probably done.

ILL BITE YOUR LEGS OFF

Demarcotion Criteria (4-6, 6th in points)
Demarco couldnt go on bye at a worse time, as Demarcotion Criteria needs to win out to have a chance. Since one of Bourbon BeamerBudBrewer/Sarah Stone is guaranteed a win (well, I guess they could tie?), ftkeith will need to play some major catchup points-wise to win a tiebreak.

Champagne Supernovaks (3-7, 8th in points)
They were still in it until back-to-back losses in weeks 9 and 10. You could say they pissed their season away there.

Team Copeland (3-7, 9th in points)
This team would have been pretty solid in 2011 with Brady, McFadden, V-Jax, Larry Fitzgerald and Dwayne Bowe on the squad. Unfortunately for dieter dangler, this is not 2011, so they were less good.

Team FranklyIncensed (1-9, 10th in points)
Frank scored 116 points in week 3. Doges Plural, the best team in the league, has scored a high of 109 this year. Id call that a win.