UVA is Toast

Fellow Hokies,
This Friday we face our most hated, crispy rival. In a game more heated than a toaster our Hokies take on that crusty group of zima-sipping toast-eaters. I'm not worried though. Beating Hoos is our bread and butter. Our offense will simply spread them out, then jam the ball up the middle. Meanwhile our Lunch Pail Defense will come to feast on our slightly crunchy foes. We'll preserve the lead while the cavalier crowd turns the color of avocado with envy. They'll be totally jelly of our high-scoring, hard-hitting ways.

The heat of a game lasts a full 60 minutes, and just like the slice of toast our opponents revere, by the end of the match the Hoos will be nothing but a dried out, tasteless husk of themselves. Us Hokies, however, are more like a fresh batch of yeast rolls...put us in the oven and we rise to the occasion.

So in conclusion: Hokies are Champs, Hoos are Toast.
Happy Thanksgiving, ya'll.

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Comments

They're French toast.

They're Ffrench toast.

ftfy

The Orange and Maroon you see, that's fighting on to victory.

I had a line about Cam Phillips dunking on loluva cornerbacks like he dunks his french toast in maple syrup, but I couldn't fit it in

I'm so pissed at GT. Beating the hoos is always more fun when it keeps them from going bowling.

Warning: this post occasionally contains strong language (which may be unsuitable for children), unusual humor (which may be unsuitable for adults), and advanced mathematics (which may be unsuitable for liberal-arts majors)..

clears throat FUCK UVA

Outspoken team cake advocate. Hates terrapins. Resident Macho Man Gif Poster. Distant cousin to Dork Magic. Frequently misspells words.

Warning: this post occasionally contains strong language (which may be unsuitable for children), unusual humor (which may be unsuitable for adults), and advanced mathematics (which may be unsuitable for liberal-arts majors)..

The bolding helps, but I would still prefer you use a comma right there. 😳

Sometimes I like to leave off the /s just to mess with people.

FUCK, UVA, AND, GRAMMAR,

Outspoken team cake advocate. Hates terrapins. Resident Macho Man Gif Poster. Distant cousin to Dork Magic. Frequently misspells words.

To quote Futurama's Scruffy, The Janitor, "Oh, marmalade!"

Hmm, I don't feel too good about some of this overconfidence.

Don't worry, don't be afraid, ever, because, this is just a ride.

basically uva

Taylor, looking desperately throws it deep..HAS A MAN OPEN DANNY COALE WITH A CATCH ALL THE WAY DOWN TO THE FIVE!!!!....hes still open

This is my favorite thing you've ever posted. Big ol' leg and let's leave them the heel tonight

21st century QBs Undefeated vs UVA:
MV7, MV5, LT3, Jerod Evans, Michael Brewer, Tyrod Taylor, Sean Glennon, and Grant Noel. That's right, UVA. You couldn't beat Grant Noel.

warm buttery toast

Can't believe I hadn't heard of that inspirational toaster before. What a great idea but it should have been a cupcake pan because toast Loluva reminds me of this fine creation.

'Hoos up for Shit on a shingle?