Frank Beamer

Why? Because I saw it happen and figured we all needed a laugh. It's after the jump to preserve our sanity for the week.

"Don't be messing with my kicker." Beamer's tone was both playful and serious, although his face read with a dismissive, "just fucking try me." That was the conclusion to an anecdote about an over-coached punter that regressed on his watch at Murray State told during the Duke week presser. Special teams are the Frankinator's baby. They're an integral component of his brand of football, BeamerBall. A lot of other coaches try not to lose with special teams, Beamer tries to win with them.

Special teams were a liability this season, and that's on no one else but Frank Beamer.

The Hokies were ranked 108th nationally in net punting (33.6 yards/punt) in 2011. Scott Demler and Michael Branthover struggled to find consistency, routinely shanked balls and flipped field position out of favor. Danny Coale was more reliable and averaged 6.7 more yards a punt than the team. Even though I thoroughly enjoyed #Coale4Punter because it enhanced his legacy, it hurt the team because it detracted from him playing receiver.

The Hokies only made 72% of their field goals last season. Compare that to 95-, 87-, 79-, 81- and 95-percent success rates in 2010 back to 2006 respectively.

Reality check, a Frank Beamer coached team didn't have a dependable punter or kicker.

It's hate week, and it's a good one. Virginia beat Florida State in Doak late Saturday night, a venue where they'd previously been 0-8. The Hokies didn't clinch the ACC Coastal, and there'll be a lot of Hoos creeping out of the woodwork. From my observations on Twitter most of you were rooting for Florida State. I was in the minority then. I wasn't actively rooting for Virginia, but I wasn't upset they won. Honestly, I spent most of the game relaxing and cackling on my couch as UVa and FSU each tried to bumble away the game, with FSU ultimately proving to be most futile.

Stereotypically speaking the Hoos and Hokies are polar opposites. Uncultured wild rednecks who take pride in always supporting their football team contrasted against the couth white-collar upper-middle class obsessed with the Director's Cup. We both think we're better than each other, and the hate starts there. However, this week we both have a few things in common. Virginia hasn't won anything, and neither has Virginia Tech, but we both have hope.

via @virginia_tech

Is the Frankinator consulting with comedian Bill Cosby about the kicking game and how to proceed under the hypothetical situation that Cody Journell can't play? I don't know, you tell me!

You seeeeeeeeee, the Myer has, to, kick, the ball more consistently. It pewwwwwwwwwwwww goes the distance, just doesn't always split the bars.

When asked about how his chat with Cosby went, Beamer responded:

Real strong comedian right there, good staff of writers around him.

/raises his two fists to his chest and slowly pumps them back and forth in short bursts.

He's always well-prepared, has that "want-to". His sets are real consistent: great intro, punchlines always get after ya, finishes strong.

/serious face

Great comedians make great jokes, and that's what Bill's always done.

*And just subtle amounts of orange, Lester please take note.