Searles: Alas, poor Yorick! I knew him, Horatio: a fellow
of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy: he hath
borne me on his back a thousand times; and now, how
abhorred in my imagination it is! my gorge rims at
it. Here hung those lips that I have kissed I know
not how oft. Where be your gibes now? your
gambols? your songs? your flashes of merriment,
Teller: Are you alright coach?
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Wyatt: how does it go again Coach?
Searles: Ok...last time.....it's real easy.....you put you right arm in, you put your right arm out, you put your right arm in and you shake it all about.......
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S: The one guy has an apple in his hand letting him get a whiff of it while taking a couple steps back...
T: Yeah..
S: Then the girl turns up the speed and the next thing you know, he's running on that treadmill! Damnedest thing I ever saw!
T: That's insane! I always wondered
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Searles: So we are there in the restaurant eating pizza and this guy comes in, people called him "french", and he orders a pizza... WITH NO CHEESE!
Teller: NO CHEESE!?! ... but I thought French people loved cheese?
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Comments
Coach: Do I have something on my face?
Coach, I got 3 words for you... Beefy. Fritos. Burrito.
Teller: Why did you hit me Coach?
Searles: Beware of the "Searel Special" at all times!! It's been fully dipped in Dork magic.
Teller: "Coach, what do you mean you don't like cheese on your burritos?!"
Searles: "Wyatt you have to stop eating 8 of those burritos. The things are as big as my hand!"
Searles: The horror of seeing the poor thing laying there alone, cold, and with extra guacamole. It was too late to save it!
Teller: Say it isn't so coach!
And that is why we always wash our hands before making pancakes...
Searels: "I just polished off my second rail and then thought to myself, 'What's the worst thing that could happen if I get a third rail?'"
This is talking about drinks, right?
"Coach, I don't want to face off with Sam Rogers in the Oklahoma drill!"
Searles: Wyatt, the barber screwed your haircut up. See, look in this mirror.
Damn it Wyatt, why did you sack the quarterback? Look at the poor guy laying on the ground!
But coach, ya'll recruited me for defense and I thought I was "The Boz" with my new haircut.
Searles: Hey Wyatt, man, have you ever just, you know, looked at your hand? I mean, really looked at your hand?
"And why do they even call them fingers? I've never even seen them fing....Oh wait, there they go!"
Searels: "Wyatt, you don't stop eating at Taco Bell you're gonna eat them out of business"
Teller: "WHAT DID YOU SAY?!?"
Searels: "Nothing. Free beefy fritos burritos after practice for you and a friend."
Searles: Alas, poor Yorick! I knew him, Horatio: a fellow
of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy: he hath
borne me on his back a thousand times; and now, how
abhorred in my imagination it is! my gorge rims at
it. Here hung those lips that I have kissed I know
not how oft. Where be your gibes now? your
gambols? your songs? your flashes of merriment,
Teller: Are you alright coach?
And the award for "Most Thought Out Caption" goes to.......
Searles: When you meet her daddy you just put out yer hand and say "Pleased to meet ya".
Teller: You mean I shouldn't knock him down!?
Searles: Wyatt have you ever had that "not so fresh feeling"?
Teller: What the hell did you just say??!!!
"As senior rooster 'round here, it's my duty, and my pleasure, to instruct junior roosters in the ancient art of roostery"
I can't believe you are a burrito this long!!!!
"Dammit Wyatt - how many times do I have to tell you - anything you put into the teleprompter, Ron Burgundy will read."
Wyatt: how does it go again Coach?
Searles: Ok...last time.....it's real easy.....you put you right arm in, you put your right arm out, you put your right arm in and you shake it all about.......
Don't be a pussy. Squash 'em like this every time.
Coach: "You can't truly pancake defenders Wyatt unless you gut sticks out to here."
Wyatt: "Coach, you can't handle my dinner bill!!!"
Teller: No way Coach, French is the best fisherman around
Searles: French may be good, but I once caught a bass this big
Coach: Son I don't know why Virginia sucks so bad in football!
Searles: "And they realized, they were no longer little girls: they were little women."
Oh, I've missed a good old CTC thread.
I'm afraid your Mom called. She wants you to get a haircut for Mother's Day.
Wyatt denies Searels the tag. No one saw this heel turn coming.
S: The one guy has an apple in his hand letting him get a whiff of it while taking a couple steps back...
T: Yeah..
S: Then the girl turns up the speed and the next thing you know, he's running on that treadmill! Damnedest thing I ever saw!
T: That's insane! I always wondered
Searles: "I smoked pot with Johnny Hopkins."
You don't know a Johnny Hopkins
S.This feller is Ulam, he is going to be the tackle on your side of the line and you two will become Death.
T. Dude, that is dark
S: At first he's upright, then you make him like this.
Searles: So we are there in the restaurant eating pizza and this guy comes in, people called him "french", and he orders a pizza... WITH NO CHEESE!
Teller: NO CHEESE!?! ... but I thought French people loved cheese?
Winner winner, chicken dinner!
a sphincter says what?
Teller: you put your hand where?