This is the sole reason why I'll never respect anything Brian Kelly does. He exerted his power and influence to create a safety hazard that ended up with a death and then absolutely tried to absolve himself of all responsibility. I think he's the worst kind of coach who shouldn't be in the profession.
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Isn't it incredible how nothing ever came of this and the media never acknowledges it anymore? Absolutely baffling to me. In that same window of time Mike Leach and Mark Mangino were crucified for "abusing" their players. This man killed a kid and nobody ever did anything about it.
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There's an article in SI (or maybe it's the Athletic), that came out yesterday regarding this story, and how BK has done "everything in his power" to give back to the family.
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That's my question! Where tf is OSHA during all the uproar? They shoulda been on the university and the athletics dept like snot on a peeled onion! Or something like that.
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Brian Kelly is the person in the office who manages to separate the plies of the shitty-office-john-wayne-two-ply-tp, so that the perforations no longer align.
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Brian Kelly responds to your email but only addresses the first of 3 separate bullet points when you specifically spelled out each thought in its simplest terms because you know Brian Kelly has the attention span of a toddler. So then you have to send the other two questions again and hope the dolt will be able to handle two whole bullet points this time around because God help me if Brian Kelly makes me ask a third time.
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When Brian Kelly enters a public bathroom and sees every urinal except for one is open, he choses the one immediately next to the already occupied urinal. He then pees a little on the floor while quietly talking to himself.
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Brian Kelly thinks anytime Burger King uses BK in a product name, that they are naming the product after him. He considers this a compliment because he thinks the food there is top notch.
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Brian Kelly flicks water in your face after washing his hands in the bathroom and jokes "oops, peed on myself!"... Then walks away laughing hysterically at his own stupid joke
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Brian Kelly sees you playing N64 smash and invites you over to play melee. Then he calls you a dumbass when you repeatedly do fox's dash attack off the level...
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Brian Kelly is a conformist who is incapable of forming his own opinions and pretends to hate Nickelback because it's the popular thing to do even though he actually still has that Silver Side Up CD in his car
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In retrospect, Brian Kelley thinks the 2001 Fiesta Bowl selection committee got it right to pick Notre Dame over the Michael Vick lead Virginia Tech Hokies, despite their lower ranking, overall record, and considering they only lost 42-9.
(and yes, I'm still pissed)
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Brian Kelly starts a conversation with you as you're trying to head to the John. Then he continues it while he's sitting in the stall next to yours. He yells, "FIRE IN THE HOLE!!" before letting loose with vociferous diarrhea.
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brian Kelly gets mad when his name shows up in the credits because his contract clearly stated that they would conceal his identity in the goonies but he still claimns he should get royalties everytime someone buys a baby ruth.
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Actually a true story...a kid from RVA named Doug Randolph recently played for ND. Kelly and the ND medical staff hid the fact that Randolph actually had spinal stenosis (same disease that ended Cooper Manning's career). He played an entire season with a statistically significant chance of being paralyzed...they fucked with the wrong family, his dad is a radiation oncologist and his siblings include a retinal surgeon and a radiation oncologist
Brian Kelly on Notre Dames offensive line: I think we're pretty good there
Brian Kelly on switching quarterbacks: A change was needed in order to reach our ceiling
Brian Kelly on fingernail chewing: The sheer smoothness makes pushing hemorrhoids back in more comfortable
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"Give me a good camera phone so I can video the kids at high-school football games cuz I just can't figure out how to find their film on the computer thing."
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Comments
brian kelly is chip kelly's brother
BRIAN KELLY KILLED A KID!!!
For those who missed it at the time, or too young to remember it, this isn't just hatin' on hyperbole. Brian Kelly sent a student videographer up on a scissor lift in gale force winds.
Brian Kelly does anagram to Kill Nearby......
This is the sole reason why I'll never respect anything Brian Kelly does. He exerted his power and influence to create a safety hazard that ended up with a death and then absolutely tried to absolve himself of all responsibility. I think he's the worst kind of coach who shouldn't be in the profession.
Absolutely. Worse than anything Art Briles did and that's saying a lot. He should be out on the street
Isn't it incredible how nothing ever came of this and the media never acknowledges it anymore? Absolutely baffling to me. In that same window of time Mike Leach and Mark Mangino were crucified for "abusing" their players. This man killed a kid and nobody ever did anything about it.
There's an article in SI (or maybe it's the Athletic), that came out yesterday regarding this story, and how BK has done "everything in his power" to give back to the family.
Can he give their son back?
Only because its hating on.....
He offered to help the mom make another one........
That burn is so savage it's smoked.
it was a response to the "media acknowledgement" albeit, if it was OSHA at one of my construction sites, he'd be fired and or jailed
That's my question! Where tf is OSHA during all the uproar? They shoulda been on the university and the athletics dept like snot on a peeled onion! Or something like that.
I believe my signature can be of service here.
Brian Kelly still thinks Notre Dame is special enough to not join a football conference.
Brian Kelly is a douchebag and I want to punch him in his block head face.
Hes a poopy head
Brian Kelly sucks.
Simple, timeless, all that needs to be said.
Bud Foster has owned Brian Kelly's offense every time we have played a team coached by him
You know, I had forgotten about the 2009 orange bowl
this is the reason ND has had this date circled for 2 years!
Brian Kelly thinks that handing out expired Hardee's coupons to recruits is stupid.
Brian Kelly is 0-3 against Virginia Tech as a head coach
he'll be 0-4 this time next week
Held true for Taggert!
Brian Kelly pours the milk in the bowl before the cereal.
What an IDIOT!
Can't believe you didn't include this with your comment:
via GIPHY
I pictured Will Ferrell commenting on what an idiot Brian Kelly had to be to die in a hang gliding accident
Yes. It was meant to be a Will Ferrel. I don't GIF much, so my bad y'all!
What kind of a fucking animal does that???
Brian Kelly removes all the marshmallows from Lucky Charms before pouring his kid's cereal.
Brian Kelly uses both sides of the TP to wipe
Brian Kelly eats dry Cheerios with a fork.
Brian Kelly likes his steak well done and smothered in ketchup.
Brian Kelly doesn't like Smithfield Bacon for breakfast
That is nauseating
What a terrible way to ruin good mustard.
Welp, that's wretched.
Brian Kelly splits 2-ply TP into 2 rolls to save money
Then uses both sides.
Credit: vtandy
Brian Kelly is the person in the office who manages to separate the plies of the shitty-office-john-wayne-two-ply-tp, so that the perforations no longer align.
Hahahaha! Nice.
Brian Kelly's mother was a hamster and his father smelt of elderberries!
Brian Kelly drives a Honda Ridgeline
Brian Kelly's other car is a Plymouth Neon.
Yep, you read that correctly.
No kidding - yesterday on my way home (Leesburg, VA) I saw a 90's neon with an exhaust/muffler. It had to be pushing 110hp, EASILY.
One of the fastest cars I've ever seen in real life for sure.
Brian Kelly forces the word artisanal into his everyday conversations.
I enjoyed this artisanal comment
Brian Kelly agreed with James Franklin's 4th and 5 play call.
So are you saying if Notre Dame played PSU, it would end in a draw?
brian Kelly was the fan that "loves him but doesn't agree with his play call" but he still loves him though
Brian Kelly had a 4-8 record during Fuente's inaugural year as VT head coach.
Brian Kelly eats hard boiled eggs whole.
Without chewing
With the shells on.
Confirmed: Brian Kelly is a lizard.
Brian Kelly has two first names in his name
Never trust a man with two first names
Brian Kelly doesn't run water over his toothbrush before or after he's put the toothpaste on.
I just want to say that I didn't participate in the weekly Hatin' On for Coach Cutcliffe....and we won.
So, ...you're all welcome.
then why are you posting here????
I was here to have you guys sing my praises, duh
lol I was just giving you crap. but if we lose I better not see you in another hating on thread for the rest of time.
Chip Kelly hates old people, children, and dogs.
And he won't let you waggle on the tee.
Brian Kelly sends Chip all his Hatin' On comments
Shiz. Had over rated teams on the brain.
Well Brian hates them too!!!!
Brian Kelly puts one sock on, then puts the SHOE on next, leaving the other foot bare.
He's a monster.
what a SOCIOPATH!!
He also ties his shoes after taking them off.
Brian Kelly killed a kid
Brian Kelly kept injuries hidden from his own players
Brian Kelly blames his players
In short....Brian Kelly is an asshole
Brian Kelly turns his porch lights off on Halloween...but everyone knows hes home.
Brian Kelly tees off first without asking, even though he shot the worst the previous hole.
Who does that?
And then "apologizes" for taking the honors. Again.
Brian Kelly holds the door for others, but only when they're entering the women's restroom
Brian Kelly is a dick.
He is an insufferable ass.
Brian Kelly softly speaks what he's typing as he types it.
IN ALL CAPS.
We are friends now.
The hiss of the s in soft tone will drive a man insane.
And follows along with his finger as he reads.
Brian Kelly responds to your email but only addresses the first of 3 separate bullet points when you specifically spelled out each thought in its simplest terms because you know Brian Kelly has the attention span of a toddler. So then you have to send the other two questions again and hope the dolt will be able to handle two whole bullet points this time around because God help me if Brian Kelly makes me ask a third time.
sounds personal! Keep us posted.
👍
Are you a teacher? Because that sounds like you're a teacher dealing with other adults.
Brian Kelly, despite coaching for Notre Dame, has never seen Rudy.
Brian Kelly thinks Rudy was offsides
Rudy was offsides
You're gonna lose this week, Brian!
and this is why brian Kelly loves when ron cherry is the lead official.
Brian Kelly thinks the Colts were correct in going for it on 4th down in OT
But also thinks the Titans were dumb when they did it
Brian Kelly was the guy that introduced Manti Te'o to his girlfriend in college
Brian Kelly was the guy that
introducedwas Manti Te'o'sto hisgirlfriend in college.I got ya my man.
Brian Kelly pays for tinder
Brian Kelly drew this amateur sketch of his schools mascot
Brian Kelly saw the leprechaun, but didn't say 'YEAH'.
Brian Kelly thinks this is the best star wars ever
This needs more votes!!!!
When Brian Kelly screams (which is all the time), his face looks like a giant red hemorrhoid about to burst all over the 50 yard line.
via GIPHY
Brian Kelly is a "L. 7. WEENIE"!!!!
not saying Brian Kelly deserves a short trip on a scissors lift, but ...
Mama always said if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all.
So I'll just go with Brian Kelly does not suck the way Primus sucks.
Brian Kelly thinks David Cutcliffe has no class, and Paul Johnson is the best coach in the ACC.
Brian Kelly thinks this is a terrible gif and mascot!!
via GIPHY
Crap I agree with Brian Kelly! Gag reflex!
In all fairness, he's half right.
Brian Kelly blames all of his mistakes on his twin brother Krian Belly:
https://www.everydayshouldbesaturday.com/2016/10/14/13268754/the-picture-of-brian-kelly
Brian Kelly is Slytherin by choice, not by heritage.
Brian Kelly smokes in the airplane bathroom
Brian Kelly killed a kid.
(I know it's been said already, but I feel it should be repeated every so often to make sure everyone sees)
Brian Kelly is the person in front of you at a stop light who can't go when the light turns green b/c he's looking at his phone.
Before taking his job, LIKE SO MANY OTHERS, Brian Kelly was a Notre Dame Football fan without any real ties to the school.
When Brian Kelly enters a public bathroom and sees every urinal except for one is open, he choses the one immediately next to the already occupied urinal. He then pees a little on the floor while quietly talking to himself.
He also pats you on the back and says "the water's cold and deep."
And then he side eye's your junk.
Brian Kelly wears "BK Knights"
Any child of the 80's should get this
Brian Kelly thinks deshone kizer should still be the starting QB for the browns
Brian Kelly cheats when playing Uno with his kids.
Brian Kelley still can't figure out his starting QB
Brian Kelly doesn't believe that the Millenium Falcon is the ship that made the Kessel run in under 12 parsecs.
Brian Kelly holds his cell phone in his left hand and types with is right index finger.
Oh, and Brian Kelly once killed a kid.
Brian Kelly writes checks at the grocery store
Brian Kelly says "now lets go kick some GD A$$" right after the team Chaplin says the prayer before each game.
Brian Kelly once called the spork 'Mankind's magnum opus'.
Which anagrams to "Madman nuking possum".
Brian Kelly's dream job is LOLUVA.
Brian Kelly has an open door policy but always keeps his door locked.
Brian Kelly was born.
Brian Kelly thinks anytime Burger King uses BK in a product name, that they are naming the product after him. He considers this a compliment because he thinks the food there is top notch.
Brian Kelly nicknamed his junk the BK Whopper
Damnit, I actually laughed at work!
Brian Kelly's coaching tree includes Butch Jones.
Brian Kelly lets student assistants die.
Brian Kelly likes Toby
Brian Kelly thinks Kevin is a real person.
Brian Kelly flicks water in your face after washing his hands in the bathroom and jokes "oops, peed on myself!"... Then walks away laughing hysterically at his own stupid joke
Brian Kelly still listens to Dane Cook albums
Brian Kelly only uses Fox in Smash Bros 64
Respect to Brian Kelly for not being a filthy casual.
Brian Kelly actually liked Smash Bros 64 instead of the far superior version on the GameCube.
Brian Kelly didn't like that I always played with Mewtwo.
Brian Kelly sees you playing N64 smash and invites you over to play melee. Then he calls you a dumbass when you repeatedly do fox's dash attack off the level...
Luckily for me I PLAY WITH F@ACHING MEWTWO
Brian Kelly thinks Metaknight isn't overpowered in Brawl.
Also Luigi's #1.
Brian Kelly slices his brisket with the grain
Brian Kelly listens to Nickelback.
Brian Kelly is a conformist who is incapable of forming his own opinions and pretends to hate Nickelback because it's the popular thing to do even though he actually still has that Silver Side Up CD in his car
Brian Kelly taught R. Kelly everything he knows about urolagnia (aka. Golden Showers)....
Another reminder that Brian Kelly killed a student.
Brian Kelly tries to hold Asia in Risk.
Brian Kelly is the head coach at Notre Dame
It is a direct result of Brian Kelly's action that someone died
Brian Kelly claims the wind "wasn't blowing that hard".
Brian Kelly says there's nothing funny about "Hooker for a score from 69"
Brian Kelly farts in a crowded elevator
Brian Kelly misspells your name in a response email when your name is clearly written in the email address itself.
I agree with jodumokie
Brian Kelly only sends emails as "Reply All".
Brian Kelly addresses you by your last name in emails as if he's your buddy from high school
Brian Kelly tells military officers he knows what it's like to send young men to their deaths.
Edit: Meant to reply to hokie07ME.
brian Kelly thinks Blacksburg is a city
Brian Kelly auditioned for Ned Beatty's role in Deliverance, but withdrew when they told him he couldn't "do his own stunts"
Plaid. Now. Make it happen.
I'm not sure if there are enough people old enough to get it
You're probably right. I forget how old that movie is.
Ned Beatty was the one celebrity that came into the music store I worked at through college. His granddaughter was a theater major at Radford.
Thought he was a pig farmer, or something squilly like that
Brian Kelly would pull Tom Brady out of a game for throwing an interception
This isn't the "Hating on Bobby Petrino" thread.
Brian Kelly is a vegan, crossfit instructor who sells Rodan & Fields "as a side hustle"
Brian Kelly spams your social media about his lularoe business
Brian Kelly is wondering if anyone can cut him a deal on getting into selling Young Living essential oils
Especially since he has a great idea for a line marketed as "Kelly Jelly".
Brian Kelly is sure you'll see results like his if you start using Monat shampoo.
Brian Kelly coaches at Notre Dame and thinks that Lou Holtz is better than Lee Corse.
Whenever I see Brian Kelly, for some reason I think of Brian Keith of Family Affair.
Even as a kid, I hated that show. Buffy and Jodie were annoying as hell, and Mr French the butler was creepy.
After perusing the interwebs I learned that Shelly Smith is basically Brian Kelly in drag.
I can't unsee that now
Brian Kelly pulls his pants and underwear around his ankles to piss at the urinal.
Brian Kelly sucks his thumb with his butthole.
Brian Kelly thought the office was better when Micheal Scott left
and thinks jim makes a great jack ryan
In retrospect, Brian Kelley thinks the 2001 Fiesta Bowl selection committee got it right to pick Notre Dame over the Michael Vick lead Virginia Tech Hokies, despite their lower ranking, overall record, and considering they only lost 42-9.
(and yes, I'm still pissed)
I can't remember. Is Brian Kelly the one that killed a kid?
Brian Kelly killed a kid
Brian Kelly uses the ND helmet paint for hair dye.
Brian Jelly
Brian Kelly has face hemorrhoids.
Brian Kelly posts in the wrong thread
Brian Kelly doesn't like Shawshank Redemption
Yet somehow he still thinks that it doesn't get enough airtime on network TV.
Brian Kelly opens internet explorer and types "Google" into the browser to begin a Google search for "YouTube videos" of prospective players
Brian Kelly shits his shorts then sticks his hand back there to check it out
Brian Kelly can fart the opening theme to Rudy
Brian Kelly looks like he rode a doughnut to town
Brian Kelly cropdusts his mom
Brian Kelly thinks Rudy is a fictitious character.
Brian Kelly has refreshed TKP every 5 minutes in hope of a VT hype video displaying Hokies dominating the Irish.
fine you caught me. I am brian Kelly
Brian Kelly thinks Jim harbaugh is a "pretty normal dude"
Brian Kelly thinks the NFL's new Roughing the QB rules are not stringent enough
Brian Kelly is planning to come to the TKP Tailgate and donate drained gift cards
Brian Kelly is cool with the Hatin' On thread being buried in the tracker by Wednesday
Brian Kelly things R Kelly's music sucks, but his actions are admirable
Brian Kellys fingernails double as flat screwdrivers
Brian Kelly took the tide pod challenge
Brian Kelly thinks Uncle Vernon is a pretty chill guy
Brian Kelly microwaves his steak
Brian Kelly is a mall cop during the week
Brian Kelly starts a conversation with you as you're trying to head to the John. Then he continues it while he's sitting in the stall next to yours. He yells, "FIRE IN THE HOLE!!" before letting loose with vociferous diarrhea.
brian Kelly gets mad when his name shows up in the credits because his contract clearly stated that they would conceal his identity in the goonies but he still claimns he should get royalties everytime someone buys a baby ruth.
... Calls him "Coach Fuentes"
Actually a true story...a kid from RVA named Doug Randolph recently played for ND. Kelly and the ND medical staff hid the fact that Randolph actually had spinal stenosis (same disease that ended Cooper Manning's career). He played an entire season with a statistically significant chance of being paralyzed...they fucked with the wrong family, his dad is a radiation oncologist and his siblings include a retinal surgeon and a radiation oncologist
Link Here
Brian Kelly fucking sucks.
Brian Kelly has a parasitic twin growing out of him he named.......Brady
Brian Kelly invented vegan meatsauce
Brian Kelly blames all of Notre Dames losses on jet contrails
Brian Kelly feeds his kids the exact same way that birds feed their young
Brian Kelly = Belly Krian or Krian Belly
Brian Kelly on Notre Dames offensive line: I think we're pretty good there
Brian Kelly on switching quarterbacks: A change was needed in order to reach our ceiling
Brian Kelly on fingernail chewing: The sheer smoothness makes pushing hemorrhoids back in more comfortable
Brian Kelly rolls up the windows and locks them before ripping a nasty wet fart in a car full of people. And blames it on one of the kids.
Brian Kelly's idea of a fun beach trip is screaming at kids while kicking over their sand castles.
And pee's off the end of the pier
And sh*ts in the surf while the tide is coming in.
While taking a selfie to share on Facebook, Snapchat, and Instagram
Cryin' Belly.
My cousin just added this to the Cellar (downstairs):
Strong penis synonym usage.
Brian Kelly uses the word "video" as a verb.
"Give me a good camera phone so I can video the kids at high-school football games cuz I just can't figure out how to find their film on the computer thing."
Or..."Damn the weather. Get that kid up in the scissor lift so he can video our practice..."
I almost went that route but opted for a layer to one of my earlier posts instead. But you're not the only one thinking it...