OT: Star Wars Episode 9 The Rise of Skywalker

Episode 9 got a title and a teaser trailer today! Everyone geek out accordingly!

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Palp laugh.

Related: The news about Disney+ basically has me ready to subscribe. The final blow? Jeff Goldblum NatGeo docuseries:

"Jeff pulls back the curtain on a seemingly familiar object to reveal a world of astonishing connections, fascinating science, and a whole lot of big ideas."

https://comicbook.com/tv-shows/2019/04/12/the-world-according-to-jeff-go...

VT Class of '12 (MSE), MVBone, Go Hokies!

You summed up in two words my biggest takeaway from the trailer.

Wait, there is going to be a Jeff Goldblum show?!?! That's fantastic. First serious consideration I've given to the idea of Disney+ is in the eight seconds since I just read that.

What a savings

So between that, the 7 bucks a month price tag, and the 2-3 Marvel shows and 2 Star Wars shows (all live-action with actors from the movies), I am basically onboard.

VT Class of '12 (MSE), MVBone, Go Hokies!

She is Luke's daughter, isn't she

And of course they are putting the remains of the Death Star in it. of course they are.

And.... of course Emperor Palpatine's laugh. Why do I get the feeling that we'll find out Palpatine was Darth Plagueis the whole time

King Alum of the House Hokie, the First of His Name, Khal of the Turkey Legs, The rightful Heir to the Big Board, the Unbanned, Breaker of Trolls and Father of Gritty

DID YOU EVER HEAR THE TRAGEDY OF DARTH PLAGUEIS THE WISE?

I THOUGHT NOT. IT'S NOT A STORY THE JEDI WOULD TELL YOU...

Do you think they'll have Darth Binks in this one?

If you're not sure if my comment warrants a "/s", it probably does.

Its Darth Darth Binks man

Directions from Blacksburg to whoville, go north till you smell it then go east until you step in it

I saw that blow up. There were not mountain sized chunks of it that would have survived atmospheric re-entry. And wouldn't it have had to landed on Yavin 4, Yavin, Endor, or the Forest Moon? What planet is that chunk-o-Deathstar on?

ESPN. The coverage is excellent, you'd be surprised at how much you can pick up.

Let's assume there somehow was a giant chunk of it. In space, technically, it could have just been blown in a direction away from any gravity fields with enough force that it kept going to pretty much any planet they want. This is, after all, Star Wars, where you can blow up a solar system of planets by firing red beams after absorbing the energy of a star to a planet covered in snow and Nazis.

My 2019 Season Challenge: only comment with Star Wars memes.

If you see these characters, they represent specific people (as of Oct. 2):

Palpatine (Fuente) || Vader (Hooker) (probationary)

LANDOOOOOOOOO!!!

I hope the twist is not that Rey is Luke's daughter but she's Lando's daughter. And Finn is Lando's son. And Poe is Lando's son. Because let's be honest, Lando gets around.

I hope the twist is not that Rey is Luke's daughter but she's Lando's daughter with Leia

FTFY.

If you're not sure if my comment warrants a "/s", it probably does.

"Sooner or later, if man is ever to be worthy of his destiny, we must fill our heart with tolerance."
-Stan Lee

"Never half-ass two things. Whole-ass one thing."
-Ron Swanson

"11-0, bro"
-Hunter Carpenter (probably)

I love the fact that Rey is doing some serious Jedi shit in this trailer. SHE FUCKING JUMPS OVER RENS TIE!!!!!

What makes you think its Ren's?

King Alum of the House Hokie, the First of His Name, Khal of the Turkey Legs, The rightful Heir to the Big Board, the Unbanned, Breaker of Trolls and Father of Gritty

Cuz Stimpy doesn't have one?

β€œYou got one guy going boom, one guy going whack, and one guy not getting in the endzone.”
― John Madden (describing VT's offense?)

BA DUM TISSS!!!

But to respond to Alum that's a great point. You never actually see who the pilot is do you?

It's Rose.

VT Class of '12 (MSE), MVBone, Go Hokies!

Meh.

I don't think it means what people are thinking. I doubt it has anything to do with lineage, more of a new type of Jedi now that they are kaput.

New Jedi Faction = Skywalkers

What's
Important
Now

Makes sense. In TLJ, Luke was talking about how the Jedi needed to end. How there was no light/dark and stuff from those ancient texts he had which Rey has now. So maybe that does cease to exist. There's no light and dark, balance is achieved, and Force users aren't Jedi/Sith but instead "Skywalkers"

The more I think about it, the more it makes sense as Rey was just a girl that was thrown away by her parents like trash.

Then you see in the last part of The Last Jedi the kid using the force.

The force being balanced makes it easier for everyone to control and or use. Rey doesn't need all that training to use the force, just like the little kid doesn't need it to use the broom. Balance.

What's
Important
Now

This whole trilogy has been a meandering waste of time. The acting has all been great, no complaints there. The story is just garbage. I don't understand whats happening or who matters. There's a new Republic but there's still a rebellion too? Oh the republic just gets blown up, problem solved now the good guys are underdogs again. There's a new evil sith lord, cool. Get's cut in half, don't worry about where he came from or who he was. Where did Rey come from? She came from nowhere, don't worry about it. By the way we are going to spend half the movie in a slow motion starship chase only to have it end with a plot device that creates a ton of problems for the whole entire continuity of the star wars universe. But look we have things like death stars and we have the millenium falcon, and we have light sabers. And most importantly there are still storm troopers to root against! Yay. I don't hate the Luke/Ben story. Its somewhat compelling. And the jedi order was flawed, which was masterfully portrayed in the Clone Wars animated series. But it feels like Disney has done less with more than the Texas football program over the last ten years.

ESPN. The coverage is excellent, you'd be surprised at how much you can pick up.

I just liked that the trailer said...

This Christmas...the saga comes to an end

They just should have added "mercifully".

Though I'm skeptical of that. I seriously doubt the Mouse spent $4 billion to acquire the Start Wars universe just for six movies. Sadly, I don't think we see the last Star Wars movie in our lifetime.

If you're not sure if my comment warrants a "/s", it probably does.

Movies? They are probably a drop in the bucket compared to everything else. MGM, or what ever it is called now, is crawling with stormtroopers, there is a new Star wars only park on the way. There are cartoons and toys and all kinds of other stuff. I'm not sure who really owns the books. But there is a lot of other ways to make the monies.

I seriously doubt the Mouse spent $4 billion to acquire the Start Wars universe just for six movies.

Of course not.

The Skywalker saga is ending. The Star Wars universe as a whole will continue to be a Disney money train for the foreseeable future.

What that looks like without the Skywalker family, well, that's TBD. Maybe a lot like Rogue One and Solo.

If the future movies is like Rogue One, I would love that. I think Rogue One is the best Post-Disney Star Wars movie, especially how they made some of the Rebels be like Insurgents and how the Empire is still terrifying because neither side was good. Also didn't mind that Rogue One didn't show much of Jedi/Force stuff because I think that should only be part of the story instead of the main focus.

"Oi! What's a Horkie"
"I am ya Grot!"

"Horkies were made for two fings foighten' and winnen'" - Horkie Warboss

"That Gritty git doesn't exactly look like a Horkie, but by Gork and Mork it acts like one!"-Random Horkie Boy

Would love to see a Shadows of the Empire film.

What's
Important
Now

Agreed. I really liked Rogue One as well, and generally thought Solo was a good ride. Shadows of the Empire would also be awesome.

Clearly Disney is capable of producing top notch content. I just think with the main storyline of Eps 7-9 they probably had too many cooks in the kitchen, including some top execs who had an over-simplified view of what Star Wars should feel like. Ah well, I suppose they have made a ton of money, so as per usual their BS paid off.

What is that? Ender, Bean, and Palpatine?

Shadows the Empire Wiki

It was originally a novel, later a comic book, but most well known for being one of the first N64 games available. The story is an attempted rescue mission of Han Solo from Boba Fett.

LucasArts's Shadows of the Empire was one of the first games available for the Nintendo 64, and later for Windows. The most commercial product in the Shadows of the Empire line, the game was first released in December 1996 as an exclusive N64 title five months after the console's launch.[9] The PC version came nearly a year later in September 1997.[10]

In the game, players control mercenary Dash Rendar in his efforts to help Luke Skywalker and rescue Princess Leia from Prince Xizor's hands. It is divided into four parts (or chapters).

I think most Star Wars fans would agree they would love to see this made. I actually think the Solo movie was made in an attempt to eventually do this.

What's
Important
Now

I fail at making a rhyming Star Wars / Ender nerd crossover joke.

OHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

What's
Important
Now

All good. Leg for giving a really, really solid response that was much higher quality than my junk post.

Shadows of the Empire was a great game, if for no other reason than the snowspeeder mission.

You sir, have hit the nail on the head. Lucasfilm was far more interested in pulling the nostalgia card (Look, it's Han! Look, it's Luke (actually Jake)!, etc...) to get seats filled, then retcon the Original Trilogy character arcs (Luke's being the most blatant) and killing off each, all in hopes that their poorly-developed new characters will simply replace the OT characters in fans' hearts.

Been an avid Star Wars fan since 1977. Now, I'm just not interested anymore.

HTHokie93

I look forward to reading about how much Fernley hates this.

"Sooner or later, if man is ever to be worthy of his destiny, we must fill our heart with tolerance."
-Stan Lee

"Never half-ass two things. Whole-ass one thing."
-Ron Swanson

"11-0, bro"
-Hunter Carpenter (probably)

This made me laugh.

Been traveling but will try to post the hate tonight. At this point I can shoot lightning from my fingers.

I like to think that the helmet clip is a sly metaphor for Abrams fixing Johnson's garbage.

This movie better end with teddy bears with stick dancing!

Edit: sorry if this is a spoiler for some one.

Yub yub

Directions from Blacksburg to whoville, go north till you smell it then go east until you step in it

Maybe the Storm Troopers will have better helmets this time. Ones that protect against rocks.

My 2019 Season Challenge: only comment with Star Wars memes.

If you see these characters, they represent specific people (as of Oct. 2):

Palpatine (Fuente) || Vader (Hooker) (probationary)

After eating the storm troopers, of course

King Alum of the House Hokie, the First of His Name, Khal of the Turkey Legs, The rightful Heir to the Big Board, the Unbanned, Breaker of Trolls and Father of Gritty

Man, those little furballs were going to roast Han and Luke alive and then consume them. Hands down the most savage race encountered in the whole saga.

Ewoks gotta eat

Grew up in the original Star Wars saga. Have to say the TLJ was mostly a direct reflection of Hollywood's looney politically narrative based position. It was horrible and painful to watch. As someone posted earlier = garbage. This is what happens to anything (these days especially) when they focus more on driving political narratives vs focusing on their true craft. I wish I had a better feeling about this movie, but my gut tells me it will be utter garbage (just reinforcing a previous comment).

You're joking, right? The original trilogy is incredibly political.

People typically only see politics in things when it challenges their own beliefs

King Alum of the House Hokie, the First of His Name, Khal of the Turkey Legs, The rightful Heir to the Big Board, the Unbanned, Breaker of Trolls and Father of Gritty

Rey is related to or a clone of ol Palpy.

My Force Boner is lit

I can imagine no more rewarding a career. And any man who may be asked in this century what he did to make his life worthwhile, I think can respond with a good deal of pride and satisfaction:
β€œI served in the United States Navy"

KCCO

"Sooner or later, if man is ever to be worthy of his destiny, we must fill our heart with tolerance."
-Stan Lee

"Never half-ass two things. Whole-ass one thing."
-Ron Swanson

"11-0, bro"
-Hunter Carpenter (probably)

Thank you for getting the reference! Close tie with Blazing Saddles for best Mel Brooks movie ever

I can imagine no more rewarding a career. And any man who may be asked in this century what he did to make his life worthwhile, I think can respond with a good deal of pride and satisfaction:
β€œI served in the United States Navy"

KCCO

History of the World, Men in Tights, and the producers are all up there too. Dracula dead and loving it also a personal favorite of mine.

Twitter me

I hate to say this as a SW fan since the beginning when I saw Episode 4 at the tender age of 12 and fell in love with the genius of George Lucas, but I am seriously considering not paying to see this Episode. The past 2 episodes and the Han Solo thing have been sooooo disappointing that I am genuinely doubtful that Disney can salvage a good story out of those sorry retreads. Originality was a huge part of the appeal in Episodes 4-6, and nothing about 7&8 has felt original or engaging except possibly the relationship between Rey and Kylo. Call me jaded, but I enjoyed Episodes 1-3 more than I have 7-8 so far (minus the Jar-Jar idiocy of course). Guess I will read the reviews when it comes out and decide from there. At least I will be in Peru where tickets only run about 8 bucks.

VTCC '86 Delta Company, Hokie in Peru, TKPC#490, One of us!

Oh, you know that you and Joanie will watch it and have a wonderful time. ;^)

If you're not sure if my comment warrants a "/s", it probably does.

Maybe it's cause I have kids now, but I loved Ep 7, 8 was a slog, and the ending was Disney style cheesy, BUT, my daughters loved it and are hooked. To me, that's just as important, because this past generation has been missing the it factor with Star Wars. It is such a wonderful story, universe, immersion, that it needs to continue inspiring generations moving forward.

TKPhi Damn Proud
BSME 2009

Wasn't it suggested that Darth Sidious was the one who manipulated the force to create Anakin? If so it would be a crazy twist if Rey was created the same way only she never turned.

Also apparently in the Clone Wars cartoon, sith cannot return as force ghosts, rather they can attach themselves to objects and haunt said object. So it's quite possible that the Emperor is haunting whatever remains of the original death star.

What's
Important
Now

Maybe he's haunting that old throne

Reach for Excellence!

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Proud Hokie since 2004.

One of the great SW expanded universe series of books involved an old extremely powerful Sith named Exar Kun haunting the temple on Yavin 4 where Luke established his Jedi Academy (obviously not canon anymore, but a better story than any of the more recent movies)

I'm really disappointed in the title they chose. They missed out on a great opportunity:

Warning: this post occasionally contains strong language (which may be unsuitable for children), unusual humor (which may be unsuitable for adults), and advanced mathematics (which may be unsuitable for liberal-arts majors)..

I think RocketCity nailed most of why these films are total shit, but let's focus on this trailer.

It starts with the line "we passed on all we know" Really? When did that happen? Was drinking milk from the teet of a rock dwelling alien cow some sort of wax on, wax off Miyagi style mind fuck training where Luke passed on the ways of the Jedi to Rey, literally "all he knows"? And who the hell is "we" for that matter? Luke didn't train her. Nobody has. Kylo has taught her more about the force than anyone else and that's mostly been via a plot device shirtless astral projection ruse orchestrated by a Sith Lord who was supposedly all powerful yet we knew nothing about and was killed with zero discovery by the flick of a wrist. Fucking... LAME.

But ok sure Rey is the ONE force weilding being who requires zero training. She is like patient zero of an disease outbreak and somehow just learns "all you know" through some sort of cosmic osmosis. Got it.

Then we see her in some sort of chicken style standoff with a modified tie fighter that is flying inches of the ground. Sure, let's assume the ground is completely flat that entire distance but here's a question, if the tie fighter is attacking why THE FUCK would you be attacking head on at that altitude? Guns don't work maybe? Then why get close enough to someone with a damn lightsaber? Oh ok, maybe it's a friend and they ONLY know how to accelerate. Yeah... that makes a lot of sense. LAME

Ends with the main characters finding a portion of the Death Star and Palpatine laughing. Did this mofo survive being tossed over by Vader and the planet level explosion that ripped it asunder, the presumably lack of atmosphere while it traveled to whatever planet this is then entry into the planet atmosphere AND falling at terminal velocity that somehow didn't reault in an epic level impact crater and a planet level extinction event, and has been living in this part of the Death Star this whole time? Blindly orchestrating the resurgence of the Order through some stooge name Snope and living of that planets alien cow milk? Or is he just communicating beyond the grave in astral form and is somehow still the real villian?...... L. A. M. E.

I could not be happier that the "saga" is coming to an end. This whole thing has been handled terribly. Great acting, absolutely shittastic story and directing. Pathetically bad.

Time to get away from the main characters. Create stories in the world. New characters. New worlds. More Rogue One. Less bullshit. And i actually liked the Han movie. At least more than any of these.

Disney has done such a horrendous job with Star Wars that it cancelled plans to open a Star Wars land in Shanghai Disneyland and is now opening Zootopia. They need to hand over then reigns to Fiege and let him sculpt a multi-film arc worthy of the brand.

Not looking forward to this at all.

#thingsiblamethemvsfor

The Han Solo movie was great. The people who hate it are the ultra Star Wars nerds who nitpick the shit out of the smallest of details.

What's
Important
Now

They rushed it out too early after the fairly ridiculed Ep.8. If they had stuck to the holiday release schedule I think it would have done much better. People still wanted to hate Star Wars that May.

Solo was good. Not on the level of Rogue One but better than the narrative.

VT Class of '12 (MSE), MVBone, Go Hokies!

Sooooooo, you're not going to see it, then?

I've seen every star wars film in cinema since return of the jedi. My hate would not be complete if I didn't see myself all the way to the dark side. So of course I am going.

fernleytheselfmadeSithhokie

21st century QBs Undefeated vs UVA:
MV7, MV5, LT3, Josh Jackson, Jerod Evans, Michael Brewer, Tyrod Taylor, Sean Glennon, and Grant Noel. That's right, UVA. You couldn't beat Grant Noel.

All of this is why I want to like Ep. 9 so bad, but probably won't.

21st century QBs Undefeated vs UVA:
MV7, MV5, LT3, Josh Jackson, Jerod Evans, Michael Brewer, Tyrod Taylor, Sean Glennon, and Grant Noel. That's right, UVA. You couldn't beat Grant Noel.

Saw this earlier that can sum up the trailer and agree with:
"We don't know much. What we do know, is that Palpatine (or the senate, according to some.) will be returning in a major role. However, this enrages the old guard of the Star Wars community. Why? The entire storyline of Star Wars was built around the idea of Anakin Skywalker's fall, and eventual redemption. He was the "chosen one", right? But now, seeing as the big bad is not dead and might end up being killed by Rey the Mary Sue, this essentially means that Anakin died for nothing, and that all his character development meant nothing in the grand scheme of things."

"Oi! What's a Horkie"
"I am ya Grot!"

"Horkies were made for two fings foighten' and winnen'" - Horkie Warboss

"That Gritty git doesn't exactly look like a Horkie, but by Gork and Mork it acts like one!"-Random Horkie Boy

Also this.

21st century QBs Undefeated vs UVA:
MV7, MV5, LT3, Josh Jackson, Jerod Evans, Michael Brewer, Tyrod Taylor, Sean Glennon, and Grant Noel. That's right, UVA. You couldn't beat Grant Noel.

I see 7, 8, and 9 as showing what is meant by bringing balance to the force. The story to this point is incomplete. Anikin did what was philosophized and brought balance. This is what balance looks like, balance brings different rules. We are also seeing the fallout of what happened after the Empire fell.

I doubt we actually see the Emporer in true form. I do think they will do the haunting thing that is found in the books.

What's
Important
Now

Love this comment. I'll also add the the whole new trilogy is pretty much a bad fan fiction written by a middle school drama student.

"We'll have one of the storm troopers join the good side because he finds his FEELINGS (and is also somehow the only one out of millions to ever switch sides), then our bad guy will be the troubled teen from breakfast club except somehow even more of a wuss and drama queen."

But the worst of it to me is the lack of world building, the lack of moving pieces, the lack of any suspense and questioning what will happen next. Just looking at the characters it's really only the 6 or 7 main ones and then background dudes. There are hardly any of medium importance that aren't totally interchangable. That will never be interesting for 3 movies. It's the antithesis of a good plot and while most of the blame falls on Rian Johnson for absolutely pissing away any possibly interesting storyline, JJ didn't set it up to be that interesting to begin with.

That lightsaber is so impractical. I'd venture to say that's a "cave" Rey, where she battles her dark side self.

Would be much cooler if it worked like this

Here lies It's a Stroman Jersey I Swear, surpassed in life by no one because he intercepted it.

I think so too. But some a speculating the way they are bringing back Palpatine is his essence is going to possess her. They're borrowing an idea from the old EU where Palpatine would transfer himself into various clones.

This looks very practical.

Outspoken team cake advocate. Hates terrapins. Resident Macho Man Gif Poster. Distant cousin to Dork Magic. Frequently misspells words.

Certainly versatile.

Yeah, but it would never open that easy.

Those are Imperial Star Destroyers

King Alum of the House Hokie, the First of His Name, Khal of the Turkey Legs, The rightful Heir to the Big Board, the Unbanned, Breaker of Trolls and Father of Gritty

Really hope this isn't there idea of the Katana fleet.

This and the Rey lightsaber make me think another cave scene is coming, and half this trailer is misdirection from that. I'd imagine it ties in with the Emperor too, since this is his era Star Destroyer.

Finally. What we've all been waiting for. C-3PO goes full darkside! (red eyes at 1:25ish)

C-3PO is a voidbringer confirmed.

If you're not sure if my comment warrants a "/s", it probably does.

I get this reference!

VT CEE Class of 2016/2017

5 years, 2 degrees, 33 football games as a student, and 2 Cassell court stormings later, I bleed Maroon and Orange

Plot twist confirmed Palpatine has reincarnated into Jar Jar and he and c-3po have come to claim what is theirs

Directions from Blacksburg to whoville, go north till you smell it then go east until you step in it

Dude between this, Mandalorian Trailer and Obi-Wan announcement my force boner could rival Dark Helmet and Lonestar combined!

I can imagine no more rewarding a career. And any man who may be asked in this century what he did to make his life worthwhile, I think can respond with a good deal of pride and satisfaction:
β€œI served in the United States Navy"

KCCO

I'm just pissed that the mandalorian show will be on their sub based service only

Directions from Blacksburg to whoville, go north till you smell it then go east until you step in it

With all the Star Wars & Marvel stuff that will be exclusive to the platform, there is no way I am not getting it.

that trailer alone was enough to get me and my roommate to agree to split a year's subscription cost lol

"Why gobble gobble chumps asks such good questions, I will never know." - TheFifthFuller

Pain is Temporary, Chicks Dig Scars
Glory is Forever, Let's Go Hokies!!

The Millennium Falcon gets destroyed in some sacrificial way in this movie, calling the shot.

These pretzels are making me thirsty.

Shut your filthy mouth and stop trying to destroy my 1977 intergalactic hot rod. /s. Sorta

VTCC '86 Delta Company, Hokie in Peru, TKPC#490, One of us!

"That move was slicker than a peeled onion in a bowl of snot." -Mike Burnop

Chewbacca better not be on it at the time

Never Forget #1 Overall Seed UVA 54, #64 UMBC 74

I say possible, but the ship was around way before the prequel trilogy it seems a waste to get rid of it. Piece of shit needs to be immortal.

ESPN. The coverage is excellent, you'd be surprised at how much you can pick up.