Bud is a genius, but he has a secret weapon this season that has really helped us to the next level: THE LUNCH PAIL!
You see, I heard Frank Beamer discovered a little something special about this year's lunch pail....
THE STORY OF DORK MAGIC
Every year Frank get's a lunch pail donated by a coal miner. This year's pail seemed odd in that it just showed up on his desk with no stamps or return address... It was just there, and it was glowing.
He quickly grabbed Bud Foster and the two of them opened it.... only to find themselves sucked inside the lunch pail!!!
Inside the pail was this bizarre goop they were completely covered in. Confused and distressed, they cried out for help, only to be greeted by a two headed Eagle (ohhhh snap a Double Eagle some might say). Double Eagle revealed to them the secret of the goop they had been fully dipped in: Long ago, forged in the hills of southwestern virginia, a small band of Dorks (as they liked to be called) practiced a dark art of domination.
They had created a substance that when they completely submerged themselves in, they became invincible. This substance was discovered when they were using a primitive form of autocorrect while writing letters (probably while drunk).
Editor's note: a similar process was used to discover small cat's can't be denied touchdowns...
After all this had been explained, the two headed eagle sent Bud and Frank back with their new found secret weapon. Strangely enough, this is why so many practices have not been open to the media, as it involves a very intense dipping process...
Below is the only leaked photo we have been able to get our hands on:
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That's funny. I think my nightmare would be standing face to face with Bud Foster and trying to explain to him why I photo-shopped his face into a pile of orange goo inside the Lunch Pail.
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I was yelling at the TV when Sam finally got his touchdown "HE CAME FULLY DIPPED. YOU CANNOT DENY HIS PUSSY TOUCHDOWNS. THERE'S TOO MUCH DORK MAGIC." My friends were very baffled.
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Bud will be in greater demand with a marquee win on the road! Might be time to give the man a RAISE along with Torrian!!!!!! Going to have to start paying for the best coaches!
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IIRC, Hokie X-tra App has several iterations. I haven't tried any of their recent versions, but I downloaded several apps from Hokiesports in the past and they were all lacking in any real content.
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Comments
He's the best DC in College Football.
For the billionth time, HELL NO! He's a Hokie!
Duh.
Whoever commented about him being at tech for 25 years is still saaaaalllty
One game and they want our Bud. haha
AIN'T. HAPPENING.
Bud is a genius, but he has a secret weapon this season that has really helped us to the next level: THE LUNCH PAIL!
You see, I heard Frank Beamer discovered a little something special about this year's lunch pail....
THE STORY OF DORK MAGIC
Every year Frank get's a lunch pail donated by a coal miner. This year's pail seemed odd in that it just showed up on his desk with no stamps or return address... It was just there, and it was glowing.
He quickly grabbed Bud Foster and the two of them opened it.... only to find themselves sucked inside the lunch pail!!!
Inside the pail was this bizarre goop they were completely covered in. Confused and distressed, they cried out for help, only to be greeted by a two headed Eagle (ohhhh snap a Double Eagle some might say). Double Eagle revealed to them the secret of the goop they had been fully dipped in: Long ago, forged in the hills of southwestern virginia, a small band of Dorks (as they liked to be called) practiced a dark art of domination.
They had created a substance that when they completely submerged themselves in, they became invincible. This substance was discovered when they were using a primitive form of autocorrect while writing letters (probably while drunk).
Editor's note: a similar process was used to discover small cat's can't be denied touchdowns...
After all this had been explained, the two headed eagle sent Bud and Frank back with their new found secret weapon. Strangely enough, this is why so many practices have not been open to the media, as it involves a very intense dipping process...
Below is the only leaked photo we have been able to get our hands on:
This makes total sense to me and definitely happened in Hokie Land
Sometimes, and I really mean sometimes, I really hope people note the tag- serious and not so serious......
I don't think that tag is on the site anymore.
my wife: what are you laughing at?
me: it would take too long to explain.
cheers brother
That's funny. I think my nightmare would be standing face to face with Bud Foster and trying to explain to him why I photo-shopped his face into a pile of orange goo inside the Lunch Pail.
Just Bud? Not Rogers with a fairy wand and laser eyes?
strangely enough, the Sam Rogers portion isn't photoshop.
lol @ the corn dogs.
I'm currently having a good laugh at Brewer's face just kinda floating there.
Haha yeah this made me laugh. That he appears 2-D and on a totally different plane of existence does it for me.
That was epic. Did anyone else yell out "dork magic!" When JC got his first down?
I was yelling at the TV when Sam finally got his touchdown "HE CAME FULLY DIPPED. YOU CANNOT DENY HIS PUSSY TOUCHDOWNS. THERE'S TOO MUCH DORK MAGIC." My friends were very baffled.
This. This is epic. This is glorious. This is epically gloriously epic. This is epigloriepic.
This site makes Virginia Tech football just so much better, which I previously didn't think was possible. GUNTAR is the man!
Bud will be in greater demand with a marquee win on the road! Might be time to give the man a RAISE along with Torrian!!!!!! Going to have to start paying for the best coaches!
Something tells me Whit is on this... The guy just has his gametight right now.
Random question: was the Hokie X-tra app around last year? Or is this a newer Whit launch?
IIRC, Hokie X-tra App has several iterations. I haven't tried any of their recent versions, but I downloaded several apps from Hokiesports in the past and they were all lacking in any real content.
And now for my standard "yeah, what else is new?" post:
In other news, water is wet and UNC cheats.
And more probation for GT
Double secret probation.
Then they can repeal the probation whenever they feel like it.
Thank you Captain Obvious