WAY OT: Help Settle a Marital Debate by Answering a Poll

Alright people, I know this is completely random, but hey we need a little fun in our lives--especially with it being the bye week.

HokieEnginerd and I disagree on this answer. We outsourced it to friends but I wanted a larger answer pool just for the sake of it.

Which utensil---spoon or fork--- do you use to eat potatoes (mashed and baked)? You have to choose one--spork is not an acceptable response...

AND GO!!

I will post our thoughts later.

Forums: 
DISCLAIMER: Forum topics may not have been written or edited by The Key Play staff.

Comments

By itself? As a side or as a topping like say for a meat pie?

Wet stuff on the red stuff.

Join us in the Key Players Club

If you are eating dinner and you have potatoes. How do you eat them?

2 time Longwood grad married to a Hokie.

Fork.

Wet stuff on the red stuff.

Join us in the Key Players Club

Do you eat pie with a spoon? I figure the answer to both is fork

I eat pie. If there is a utensil available, that is merely a bonus.

Five star get after it 100 percent Juice Key-Playing. MAN

Why would someone ever use a spoon for either of these things...?

Fork.

"Go Hokies!" - Thomas Jefferson
@HaydenDubya

If I'm heating up leftover mashed potatoes to just eat them I'm not getting two utensils dirty and I'll just use spoon I scooped them out of container with to eat too.

Wet stuff on the red stuff.

Join us in the Key Players Club

There, I've spotted the problem.

You mean that there were left over mashed potatoes in the first place?

Those don't exist in my house because I will bat cleanup on some taters.

"How the ass pocket will be used, I do not know. Alls I know is, the ass pocket will be used."
- The BoD

yup

Marital debate you say?

You're both wrong. That's that. You're welcome

Ask me no questions, and I'll tell you no lies

You're both wrong

Your wife is right. FIFY.

It's a friendly debate.

2 time Longwood grad married to a Hokie.

It started off as a friendly debate at least.... Now he says I am full of myself. I think he might be a little salty.. Maybe he can use some of his salt on his potatoes.

2 time Longwood grad married to a Hokie.

And now your friendly marital debate has turned this beautiful message board against itself. I hope you're happy

Ask me no questions, and I'll tell you no lies

I find it funny that my stupid conversation with my wonderful hubby turned into this craziness... I mean I know it is the bye week, but I never thought that it would go this far.

2 time Longwood grad married to a Hokie.

You underestimate TKP. Rookie mistake

Edit: 200 plus comments. This is mayo levels of chaos.
Edit 2: 300 plus comments. This is hitting cake vs pie levels of nonsense. That's right I said it. Go team cookie.

Ask me no questions, and I'll tell you no lies

Fork.

Doesn't matter if it's cake or pie as long as it's chocolate.

Fork every damn time, For forks sake!

"That team is gonna win football games, ok, they've got good players and good schemes and all that kind of stuff, BUT NOT TODAY!!! NOT TODAY!!"
- CJF

Fork. Works best for all varieties of tater.

A similar utensil debate has raged in my family for years as my brother-in-law insists pie is always eaten with a fork even with ice cream.

You are all heathens.

I found the guy who uses a spork.

Outspoken team cake advocate. Hates terrapins. Resident Macho Man Gif Poster. Distant cousin to Dork Magic. Frequently misspells words.

As your name would suggest, you have a BS from VT. So, I would assume that you can appreciate some efficient engineering approaches. The fork would be the efficient tool for the job. I'm not eating steak and asparagus with a spoon, so I have no reason to switch utensils when potatoes are wanted in my belly. the up and down and switching would drive me insane. I use a fork for all on the plate...efficiently.

Now, as had been said in another comment, if I'm getting left-over mashed taters and putting some stuff on top, then the spoon that was used to scoop them out of the container will be what I'm eating them with. But at dinner on the first-shot at the potato, a fork is the call.

To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
@BuryHokie #ThanksFrank

"Some days you’re a horse and some days you’re a horse’s ass. I’ve been a horse’s ass for a little while." - Roy Halladay

Spooning leads to forking.

I find the sequence of comments hilarious. [See enginerd's comment directly above]

Hokie fan | W&M grad

So I use my fork in a potato. I fork that potato good and proper.

via GIPHY

I found TKP after two rails from TOTS then walking back to my apartment and re-watching the 2012 Sugar Bowl. I woke up the next day with this username.

He totally just called you a potato...

Warning: this post occasionally contains strong language (which may be unsuitable for children), unusual humor (which may be unsuitable for adults), and advanced mathematics (which may be unsuitable for liberal-arts majors)..

Obviously HE has given away our sides. He eats potatoes with a spoon (and has encouraged our child to do the same). I am civilized and use a fork.

2 time Longwood grad married to a Hokie.

Is this your husband?

Was....

Things you should discuss before getting engaged.

To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
@BuryHokie #ThanksFrank

Nah. I'm keeping him... He is pretty lovable.

2 time Longwood grad married to a Hokie.

Also, she loves his meat.

Warning: this post occasionally contains strong language (which may be unsuitable for children), unusual humor (which may be unsuitable for adults), and advanced mathematics (which may be unsuitable for liberal-arts majors)..

Well....... That is a true statement.... I mean everybody does.

2 time Longwood grad married to a Hokie.

"Child" is a different question. Children should always eat with a spoon, unless "straw" is an option.

Also, the best advice I've ever read was, "keep out of reach of children."

"Our job as coaches is to influence young people's lives for the better in terms of fundamental skills, work ethic, and doing the right thing. Every now and again, a player actually has that effect on the coaching staff." Justin Fuente on Sam Rogers

A fork works for everything. Spoons are basically useless. Sporks were just just made for people not good with tools. Cereal and soup can be eaten with a fork. If it so thin that you need a spoon, then you drink it.

If you think I am wrong, think of how people only use chopsticks. The fork is just merely a technological upgrade.

All right. While we're still under a caution, I want you to go back out on that track and hit the pace car.

Hit the pace car?

Hit the pace car!

What for?

Because you've hit every other goddamned thing out there, I want you to be perfect!

Spoons were used as early as the Shang dynasty of the 2nd millennium B.C., both as a cooking tool and in eating, and were more common than chopsticks until perhaps the 10th century A.D.

Wet stuff on the red stuff.

Join us in the Key Players Club

NOBODY HAS TIME FOR YOUR FUCKING FACTS. THIS IS AMERICA

All right. While we're still under a caution, I want you to go back out on that track and hit the pace car.

Hit the pace car?

Hit the pace car!

What for?

Because you've hit every other goddamned thing out there, I want you to be perfect!

I'm not sure why this is so funny to me but I have been laughing for about three solid minutes. Leg for you sir.

Danny Coale Caught That Ball!!!

Yes because someone in the Shang dynasty looked at his potatoes one dinner and said "why the fuck am I using a spoon for these?", grabbed two sticks and invented chopsticks.

I can use chopsticks for damn near anything. Very handy for potatoes of any variety.

Whoa, you have gone too far..... the spoon is the only acceptable way of enjoying Snack Packs. How would I enjoy my delicious butterscotch Snack Pack without a spoon? Apologize to the spoon now, most importantly apologize to the Snack Pack.

HokieObsession

Proof. I found it on the interwebz, so it's got to be true

Fork. Spoons are for soups and desserts other than cake.

This, incidentally, is proof that cake > pie. It gets its own utensil.

I found TKP after two rails from TOTS then walking back to my apartment and re-watching the 2012 Sugar Bowl. I woke up the next day with this username.

It's so inferior it requires it's own utensil. You can eat pie with anything.

It's Time to go to Work

A pastry fork, also known as a "pie fork" or "cake fork"...

This is some bougie ass shit. One plate. One Fork. And the container the drink came in is all you need. Your sleeve as a napkin. The rest of this could be used to build a house or something I guess.

All right. While we're still under a caution, I want you to go back out on that track and hit the pace car.

Hit the pace car?

Hit the pace car!

What for?

Because you've hit every other goddamned thing out there, I want you to be perfect!

This is why (some?) of the engineering majors at VT have (had?) to take an etiquette course at the hotel.

All right. While we're still under a caution, I want you to go back out on that track and hit the pace car.

Hit the pace car?

Hit the pace car!

What for?

Because you've hit every other goddamned thing out there, I want you to be perfect!

All right. While we're still under a caution, I want you to go back out on that track and hit the pace car.

Hit the pace car?

Hit the pace car!

What for?

Because you've hit every other goddamned thing out there, I want you to be perfect!

All right. While we're still under a caution, I want you to go back out on that track and hit the pace car.

Hit the pace car?

Hit the pace car!

What for?

Because you've hit every other goddamned thing out there, I want you to be perfect!

All right. While we're still under a caution, I want you to go back out on that track and hit the pace car.

Hit the pace car?

Hit the pace car!

What for?

Because you've hit every other goddamned thing out there, I want you to be perfect!

Bud/Wiles 2020

Just start from the outside and work your way in

Oh and eat 🥔 with a fork

"Some days you’re a horse and some days you’re a horse’s ass. I’ve been a horse’s ass for a little while." - Roy Halladay

#TeamFork

Twitter me

MRW I read the title

Never Forget #1 Overall Seed UVA 54, #64 UMBC 74

The answer is obviously, Doc. She knows how to take care of what ails you.

Happy could be choice #2... and if she is just in bed not in bed she could be Sleepy....

2 time Longwood grad married to a Hokie.

Damn, HokieEnginerd, you're lucky you're handy with the meat. Fork eating potatoes with a spoon.

"How the ass pocket will be used, I do not know. Alls I know is, the ass pocket will be used."
- The BoD

HokieEnginerd's reaction was pretty funny when he saw this thread.... I went downstairs and he pulled up TKP, saw the thread, looked at me, laughed and was like "Really?"

Edit-Now after this has been going for a while, he just shakes his head...

2 time Longwood grad married to a Hokie.

And what the hell is up with people who need a spoon to eat spaghetti?

All right. While we're still under a caution, I want you to go back out on that track and hit the pace car.

Hit the pace car?

Hit the pace car!

What for?

Because you've hit every other goddamned thing out there, I want you to be perfect!

That's to help you twirl the noodles. It's just a prop. I prefer to savagely shove them in my mouth, but using a spoon is less likely to get sauce all over yourself. If you care about such things.

I mean I have self control. I am not hooking the fork to a power drill and then twirling the noodles. I do not believe I have a huge problem with sauce going places (although I wear alot of maroon shirts).

All right. While we're still under a caution, I want you to go back out on that track and hit the pace car.

Hit the pace car?

Hit the pace car!

What for?

Because you've hit every other goddamned thing out there, I want you to be perfect!

I am not hooking the fork to a power drill and then twirling the noodles

Please do this. I'm not saying there's a tall boi of Busch Light as incentive, but there's totally a tall boi of Busch Light as incentive.

I found TKP after two rails from TOTS then walking back to my apartment and re-watching the 2012 Sugar Bowl. I woke up the next day with this username.

The real question here is: do you eat the potato skins or leave them behind? And if you eat them, how would you eat them with a spoon??

Baked potatoes are the exception. You cut them open and eat with a smaller spoon. You leave the skin.

"Some days you’re a horse and some days you’re a horse’s ass. I’ve been a horse’s ass for a little while." - Roy Halladay

^^^ See Alum07's post that this is a response to..

2 time Longwood grad married to a Hokie.

That's my own post...

I meant see Alum07's post that you responded to.

2 time Longwood grad married to a Hokie.

This is an acceptable potato consumption strategy

Not if the potato is cooked properly. A nice crispy skin cannot be discarded

Never Forget #1 Overall Seed UVA 54, #64 UMBC 74

Potato skins with A-1.

This! A thousand times this!

If you're not sure if my comment warrants a "/s", it probably does.

Yes. A1 for Potatoes. Never steak.

Ask yourself why that is? You'd likely not have ever discovered the taste if you hadn't had steak and baked potato with A1 on the steak that bled over into the potato. Admit it.

Reel men fish on Wednesdays

I thought I was the only person who did this!

Wet stuff on the red stuff.

Join us in the Key Players Club

Most of the nutrients from the potato are in the skin!

TIL I have never cooked a potato improperly. Do you all seriously not make your baked potatoes with a crispy skin? How do you even do this.

Nevermind I don't want to know. Leave me with my crispy hollowed potato skins with butter, sour cream, chives, and cheese. And maybe bacon bits.

How do you even do this.

Wrap the potato in foil and bake. Skin will be soft, not crispy. It should be noted that cooking in a microwave produces the same soggy skin on the potato (my wife does this. I have no idea how we made it to 30 years of marriage).

You are still in the minority here..

I should have told you I was posting this and we could have had a wager as to who would win. ;-)

2 time Longwood grad married to a Hokie.

This one is only baked potatoes. The only exception. So he's still wrong overall.

He and our daughter eat baked and mashed potatoes with a spoon.

2 time Longwood grad married to a Hokie.

No way. This is inaccurate. Baked potatoes are to be forked. The tongs are used to scrap the inside of the skin to get all the potatoes out. Scraping with tongs agitates them and makes them fluffy and nice. Using a spoon is like scooping ice cream out.

And you don't even need a spoon for Ice Cream. That's what cones are for.

All right. While we're still under a caution, I want you to go back out on that track and hit the pace car.

Hit the pace car?

Hit the pace car!

What for?

Because you've hit every other goddamned thing out there, I want you to be perfect!

That looks Forking Delicious.

All right. While we're still under a caution, I want you to go back out on that track and hit the pace car.

Hit the pace car?

Hit the pace car!

What for?

Because you've hit every other goddamned thing out there, I want you to be perfect!

And guess what you see beside it, a spoon.

Yeah, and a lemon. What the hell is that guy doing?

EDIT: Yes I know that is seafood salad in that potato. You know what is useless in any form of seafood? A SPOON

All right. While we're still under a caution, I want you to go back out on that track and hit the pace car.

Hit the pace car?

Hit the pace car!

What for?

Because you've hit every other goddamned thing out there, I want you to be perfect!

A spoon is pretty useful with clam chowder.

Don't get cocky. It's baked.

A smaller spoon than what? How small are the baked potatoes that you're eating?

Also, fork, knife, slice the skin, eat it. How is any of this a debate?

A teaspoon. I realize this one is particularly difficult for native born Americans.

Fun fact, when making mashed potatoes, if you boil the potatoes with the skins on and then separate them after (or just leave them on) the potatoes retain most of their starch and will give you nice thick fluffy mashed potatoes rather than thin and soupy mashed. Also the starch in the potatoes will look to absorb water when mashing, so if you put in the milk and butter at the same time the water in the milk will essentially repel the fats of the butter at the starches. So mix butter first, then milk.

Come to Blacksburg and see what the Hokie Pokie is really all about

One more reason to love TKP: come for the fork jokes, stay for the chemistry.

"Our job as coaches is to influence young people's lives for the better in terms of fundamental skills, work ethic, and doing the right thing. Every now and again, a player actually has that effect on the coaching staff." Justin Fuente on Sam Rogers

Also, put several cloves of fresh garlic in the water when you boil the potatoes.

fork, is this real?

eric

"My advice to you... is to start drinking heavily."-John Blutarsky

Yup, this was/is a real conversation we have at our house whenever we have potatoes...

2 time Longwood grad married to a Hokie.

Fork, for forkin sake

Which one of y'all is the wife? From my experience that's the winner of the argument, regardless of how crazy her answer is.

For the record, I suppose a spoon is probably the better utensil for mashed taters, but since you didn't limit your question to only that spud variant, I have to say fork.

“You got one guy going boom, one guy going whack, and one guy not getting in the endzone.”
― John Madden (describing VT's offense?)

Adam (loljk)

All right. While we're still under a caution, I want you to go back out on that track and hit the pace car.

Hit the pace car?

Hit the pace car!

What for?

Because you've hit every other goddamned thing out there, I want you to be perfect!

I am the wife.... And most people on here seem to agree with me.

2 time Longwood grad married to a Hokie.

See the wife is always right!

Forks are for shoveling cow dung and only used by American bastards

Thanks for sharing this video. I found it very interesting and enlightening. The woman's comment about forks was very funny, but potatoes are meant to be eaten skins and all with a fork.

this video always makes me happy

Spoon all day for mashed or baked. I know people stereotypically use a fork but I'm a pragmatist and a spoon is so much easier/more efficient. Not to mention it helps you to get that last little bit.

Using /s is for cowards.

All right. While we're still under a caution, I want you to go back out on that track and hit the pace car.

Hit the pace car?

Hit the pace car!

What for?

Because you've hit every other goddamned thing out there, I want you to be perfect!

Spoon.

Bud/Wiles 2020

Biscuits are for "getting that last little bit. "

My favorite pickup line to this day is "I'd sop you up like a wet biscuit"

All right. While we're still under a caution, I want you to go back out on that track and hit the pace car.

Hit the pace car?

Hit the pace car!

What for?

Because you've hit every other goddamned thing out there, I want you to be perfect!

Date much? That line does seem like it might work in West B'God, though.

Reel men fish on Wednesdays

Team Fork!

"For those who have passed, for those to come, reach for excellence."

fork

Fork

Definitely fork.

I'm not some savage..... fork.

exit light

Fork. Not as clumsy or random as a blaster. An elegant utensil for a more civilized age.

Just look at how efficient a spoon is with getting the center out of a fruit or vegetable. Let me the one to enlighten all of you today.

Show me a gif of someone doing that to an uncooked potato

..do you do this to uncooked potatoes with a fork though?

Why? I'm not claiming a fork can pull the center out of potatoes.

That dude wasted a shit ton of good kiwi there. This is done properly with paring knife.

All right. While we're still under a caution, I want you to go back out on that track and hit the pace car.

Hit the pace car?

Hit the pace car!

What for?

Because you've hit every other goddamned thing out there, I want you to be perfect!

As a 20 year foodservice professional, you sir, are incorrect. This guy's technique may have been a little sloppy, but a good thin cheap spoon can peel a kiwi way cleaner than a paring knife. Also great for peeling ginger.

Actually as a true Kiwi aficionado, they should have just ate the skin.

All right. While we're still under a caution, I want you to go back out on that track and hit the pace car.

Hit the pace car?

Hit the pace car!

What for?

Because you've hit every other goddamned thing out there, I want you to be perfect!

I have a friend who wondered about eating the skin of the kiwi. After some research, he found out he could so he did. I believe his words were "It felt like being cleaned out with a brillo pad" the next morning

I'm trying to decide if this is a good thing or a bad thing.

All right. While we're still under a caution, I want you to go back out on that track and hit the pace car.

Hit the pace car?

Hit the pace car!

What for?

Because you've hit every other goddamned thing out there, I want you to be perfect!

Let's just say he doesn't eat the skin anymore

You sick fork! Who would peel a ginger? We're people too, ya know!

"How the ass pocket will be used, I do not know. Alls I know is, the ass pocket will be used."
- The BoD

But you are supposed to eat the skin of the potato, so why do you need to remove the center at all? Using a fork results in fluffier potato. It's science.

Seriously.

And if you can't cut a potato skin with a fork you are either making baked potatoes wrong or you suck at forking.

There a lot more tools than a hammer.

Yeah but only one is good for hammering things.

All right. While we're still under a caution, I want you to go back out on that track and hit the pace car.

Hit the pace car?

Hit the pace car!

What for?

Because you've hit every other goddamned thing out there, I want you to be perfect!

The skin is what keeps the dirt out. Do you eat dirt for fun?

No but we eat the part that is dirt repellent. Duhhh..

All right. While we're still under a caution, I want you to go back out on that track and hit the pace car.

Hit the pace car?

Hit the pace car!

What for?

Because you've hit every other goddamned thing out there, I want you to be perfect!

Well, I don't know about you, but I wash the potatoes before I cook them. But my great-grandma used to say that you are supposed to eat a bushel of dirt before you die....

2 time Longwood grad married to a Hokie.

We are not talking about peeling kiwis!!! We are talking about eating like a civilized grown-up.

2 time Longwood grad married to a Hokie.

"civilized grown-up."

Why are you asking on TKP then?

Touche'. Leg for you.

2 time Longwood grad married to a Hokie.

TL;DR

Fork. What kind of mad person would even ask this non sense kind of question?

I basically dislike either you or your wife. The other person is "ok" mostly because this even made it to a vote.

Fork, but obviously the answer is whatever she says (in which case we're all right...except HokieEnginerd)

'07 Mechanical Engineering

"Touchdown, Tech! I have never enjoyed saying that more"
-Bill Roth

Am I the only one really craving a potato now?!!!!

oh, and fork...

new question spoon or straw for milkshake????????????

"Take care of the little things and the big things will come."

That just depends on how thick it is.

Well the conversation stemmed from us having baked potatoes for supper tonight (granted we have this discussion quite a bit).

And in answer to your question: Ask Frank.

2 time Longwood grad married to a Hokie.

Supper? The word is dinner!

Depends on where you're from.

2 time Longwood grad married to a Hokie.

To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
@BuryHokie #ThanksFrank

Dinner is the largest meal of the day. Lunch is a small meal before dinner. Supper is a small meal after dinner.

During the week, most people eat breakfast, lunch, and dinner. On the weekends, many people eat breakfast, dinner, and supper.

"Our job as coaches is to influence young people's lives for the better in terms of fundamental skills, work ethic, and doing the right thing. Every now and again, a player actually has that effect on the coaching staff." Justin Fuente on Sam Rogers

All right. While we're still under a caution, I want you to go back out on that track and hit the pace car.

Hit the pace car?

Hit the pace car!

What for?

Because you've hit every other goddamned thing out there, I want you to be perfect!

I actually typed, and deleted, "I, and hobbits, eat breakfast, lunch, dinner, supper, and then some."

"Our job as coaches is to influence young people's lives for the better in terms of fundamental skills, work ethic, and doing the right thing. Every now and again, a player actually has that effect on the coaching staff." Justin Fuente on Sam Rogers

fascinating ... it all makes perfect sense

Am I the only one who wants to know where are geographic breakdowns for the other choices?

If you're not sure if my comment warrants a "/s", it probably does.

I agree with the comment that said this xkcd cartoon is obligatory:

Really hard to see any regional bias there, all the answers seem to correlate with the answer's percentage and national population trend.

If you're not sure if my comment warrants a "/s", it probably does.

Straw for a shake-otherwise you're eating a cup of blended ice cream!

Way to go Bimbo!

you're eating a cup of blended ice cream!

You say that like it's a bad thing...?

"Our job as coaches is to influence young people's lives for the better in terms of fundamental skills, work ethic, and doing the right thing. Every now and again, a player actually has that effect on the coaching staff." Justin Fuente on Sam Rogers

Not at all-I'm cool with blended ice cream (for that matter I'm cool with "drinking" the melted ice cream from the bowl) - but it's not what I'm looking for if I order a shake!

Way to go Bimbo!

That's rich, being that blended ice cream is what a shake is.

Reel men fish on Wednesdays

No -a true milkshake actually has milk and extra vanilla in it (and on occasion -if you want a little extra nutrition-a raw egg or vanilla Carnation instant.). I have been to places where it is truly just ice cream run through a blender with no actual liquid and that just isn't a MILKshake!

Way to go Bimbo!

Yeah, gotta give you that. It is ice cream blended with other stuff, but you're right. Milk is necessary. Of course, it's all milk and additives, right? Maybe I should've gone there. Oh well, I concede and confer the leg. And really want a milkshake.

Reel men fish on Wednesdays

As a proper Horkie I eat with my hands. What are utensils? /s

To be serious though, I use a fork for potatoes.

"Oi! What's a Horkie"
"I am ya Grot!"

"Horkies were made for two fings foighten' and winnen'" - Horkie Warboss

"That Gritty git doesn't exactly look like a Horkie, but by Gork and Mork it acts like one!"-Random Horkie Boy

F(H)orkie knows what is up.

All right. While we're still under a caution, I want you to go back out on that track and hit the pace car.

Hit the pace car?

Hit the pace car!

What for?

Because you've hit every other goddamned thing out there, I want you to be perfect!

We know spork can't be an answer because we know KFC doesn't have potatoes. They only have disgusting blob.

So the answer is fork for mashed and your hand for twice baked. You need to salt and olive oil the skin so that you get a nice crispy salty skin. Just pick it up and eat it. Don't trust restaurants with baked potatoes, they always fuck them up.

I left out spork because this ain't my first TKP rodeo. I knew that spork would be a response and that doesn't answer the question.... And unless you are eating at fast food places, people typically don't eat with sporks.

2 time Longwood grad married to a Hokie.

I mean we have sporks at our house. But they're for stews and goulashes.

Not sure it goulashes is the proper plural.

MOOSEN! I saw a flock of moosen! There were many of 'em. Many much, moosen. Out in the woods—in the woodes—in the woodsen. The meese want the food. Food is to eatenesen! THE MEESE WANT THE FOOD IN THE WOODENESEN! AND THE FOOD IN THE WOODYENESEN!
"BRIAN! Brian... You're an imbecile."
Imbecilon!
"What are you speaking, German, Brian?"
"German, Jermaine! Jermaine, Jackson! Jackson Five! Tito!

in Fuller we trust

Y'all are obviously limited in your cooking skills...potatoes are fried; roasted; boiled; baked, twice baked, stuffed; smashed, and mashed. There are potato cakes, croquettes, skins, dumplings, and soups; and probably many options I've overlooked. There is no one utensil for potatoes and fingers might be the most common tool of all.

And in a pinch, it can all be done with a fork. Or a knife for that matter. It is just a single tine fork. Or a no cup spoon.

All right. While we're still under a caution, I want you to go back out on that track and hit the pace car.

Hit the pace car?

Hit the pace car!

What for?

Because you've hit every other goddamned thing out there, I want you to be perfect!

Bubba is that you?!

Here lies It's a Stroman Jersey I Swear, surpassed in life by no one because he intercepted it.

fork

"Why gobble gobble chumps asks such good questions, I will never know." - TheFifthFuller

Mashed or baked? A fork unless you are a preschooler. (Ducks)

VTCC '86 Delta Company, Hokie in Peru, TKPC#490, One of us!

See you understand me.

We are talking about eating like a civilized grown-up.

2 time Longwood grad married to a Hokie.

Which utensil---spoon or fork--- do you use to eat potatoes (mashed and baked)?

Mashed=Spoon unless I'm super lazy or stirring in like corn
Baked=Knife and Fork

Fork. Because I'm not a psychopath.

"That move was slicker than a peeled onion in a bowl of snot." -Mike Burnop

Fork

That team sure did suck last night. They just plain sucked! I've seen teams suck before, but they were the suckiest bunch of sucks that ever sucked.

How do I eat them - Fork

How do the Little Pail Holders (2 & 5) - Both, but usually after I've scooped, fluffed, and 'mashed' their baked potatoes (with the aforementioned fork). They start w/their forks as properly trained and then transition to teaspoons at some point to get the last scoop of goodness off their plates that they don't quite have the dexterity for with the fork yet.

Also, this is the most BYE week thread of them all. We've gone full off season summer doldrums with this one.

Run to Win. Pass To Score
Josh Jackson on Ricky Walker - ““He is the captain of this team, He’s the leader. He’s the bell cow, the Pail Holder.“

My wife has never cooked a bad potato... baked, twice baked, mashed, smashed or whatever... and I'll eat it/them with whatever utensil she puts in front of me. But if she's not looking... I'll use a fork!

Go Hokies

Danny Coale Caught That Ball!!!

(edit because the image was being blocked)

Underrated show btw

Actually watching this on Netflix right now

Warning: this post occasionally contains strong language (which may be unsuitable for children), unusual humor (which may be unsuitable for adults), and advanced mathematics (which may be unsuitable for liberal-arts majors)..

Achievement unlocked: All of the Fullers

"Sam Rogers is a college football icon" SB Nation

Thanks Frank!

A fork is the proper utensil for any food that is not liquid

Hands, hands down.

Take the shortest route to the ball and arrive in bad humor.

Wow, it's been what, two days? Bye weeks are tough on football boards.

The answer is fork.

Though it is permissible to consume mashed potatoes directly from the container they're made in with the serving spoon. The cook should always taste the food they're preparing.

Once they're served, though, potatoes are consumed using a fork.

Fork unless all you have is a spoon.

Way to go Bimbo!

Eating a baked potato with a spoon is like eating an ice cream cone with a spoon. WRONG

Never Forget #1 Overall Seed UVA 54, #64 UMBC 74

Depends. Usually I only eat baked potatoes with butter, maybe cheese and bacon bits (and with a fork). But a chili cheese potato? Definitely a spoon. Treat it like a bowl and then eat the skin when nothing else is left.

Mashed potatoes? I've used both.

Uh, fork. How is this even debatable? Which one of you is from Mars?

If a tree falls in Scott Stadium does it make a sound?

FORKS!

Let's Go

HOKIES

Man, we bye week so hard on TKP.

Fork.

Bronco uses a spoon to eat a baked potato.

To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
@BuryHokie #ThanksFrank

Forks. Why eats potatoes with a spoon? Nobody that's who

Why posts after a third Bourbon?

"Our job as coaches is to influence young people's lives for the better in terms of fundamental skills, work ethic, and doing the right thing. Every now and again, a player actually has that effect on the coaching staff." Justin Fuente on Sam Rogers

You post after the third because you're at your smartest when you're 3-5 bourbons in.

I eat shepherd's pie with a spoon. That's mostly potatoes.

Warning: this post occasionally contains strong language (which may be unsuitable for children), unusual humor (which may be unsuitable for adults), and advanced mathematics (which may be unsuitable for liberal-arts majors)..

In a household where my 2 year old is prone to reaching in the kitchen drawers, taking a handful of utensils, and then hiding them.

I use whatever I can find that's clean. Fork, spoon, knives, garlic press, whatever.

I'm clearly defeated.

Run to Win. Pass To Score
Josh Jackson on Ricky Walker - ““He is the captain of this team, He’s the leader. He’s the bell cow, the Pail Holder.“

I have those all over my kitchen. Just not on the utensil drawer.

Fun fact about those magnets is, they don't work anymore after they've been in a hot oven for a bit.

... How I figured that out? Nevermind that.

i'm imagining you loading a garlic press with mashed potatoes and squeezing it into your mouth.

The notion of this is both hilarious and unsettling. Well done.

Danny Coale Caught That Ball!!!

Unsettling? Freakin' brilliant, I say. Only thing smarter might be a caulk gun.

Wait, what?

Are you loading the potatoes into the press w/ a fork or spoon 😜

Run to Win. Pass To Score
Josh Jackson on Ricky Walker - ““He is the captain of this team, He’s the leader. He’s the bell cow, the Pail Holder.“

you both have issues

I see what is going on here, it is not the size of the fork that matters, but how you stir the spoon. Amirite?

Come to Blacksburg and see what the Hokie Pokie is really all about

Fork!!!

TN_Hokie

Team Fork!

On another note, thank you TKP for a good laugh this morning! This thread had me cracking up!

A fork of course!

"I don't know what a Hokie is, but God is one of them." L Corso

Fork all the way. Scraping mashed taters off a plate with a spoon is way more difficult than with a fork.

I'm just sayin, anyone who eats potatoes with a spoon is in serious need of help, and should probably be checked into the mental ward as soon as possible. For his or her own sake.

"Some days you’re a horse and some days you’re a horse’s ass. I’ve been a horse’s ass for a little while." - Roy Halladay

See my comment above about a chili cheese potato. :D

Fork for sure. I'd only use a spoon for soup or dessert.

Fork is the better answer and what I would typically use, but it could be whichever utensil causes the least amount of dirty utensils. If I used a spoon to scoop out mashed potatoes, I might just use the spoon to eat them. However, I'd never use a spoon during the process of fixing a baked potato so fork is the only thing I can imagine using there.

Joffrey, Cersei, Ilyn Payne, the Hound, Jeff Jagodzinski, Paul Johnson, Pat Narduzzi.

whichever utensil causes the least amount of dirty utensils

If my wife read this post, she would say that was my answer, and I would deny it, but we would both know it was true.

"Our job as coaches is to influence young people's lives for the better in terms of fundamental skills, work ethic, and doing the right thing. Every now and again, a player actually has that effect on the coaching staff." Justin Fuente on Sam Rogers

Ah, that gif brings back memories of when I was just a little Horkie, now I 'ave learned to use my hands for the food and not just the plate.

"Oi! What's a Horkie"
"I am ya Grot!"

"Horkies were made for two fings foighten' and winnen'" - Horkie Warboss

"That Gritty git doesn't exactly look like a Horkie, but by Gork and Mork it acts like one!"-Random Horkie Boy

Answer is fork.
You don't use fork to eat soup and you don't use a spoon to eat potatoes.

But what about potato soup? :D

Your mom tells you that you can go watch the VT game that just kicked off once you finished your gigantic mountain of potatoes. You have a fork on one side of the plate, a spoon on the other side, the potatoes are dead center of the plate and evenly distributed over the surface of the plate, and you are ambidextrous. Now which utensil do you use knowing that your mother has the remote and disapproves of using both utensils, your hands, or eating like a farm animal in general?

I'll give you one fucking guess buddy!

feedbag?

"Some days you’re a horse and some days you’re a horse’s ass. I’ve been a horse’s ass for a little while." - Roy Halladay

lmao

Fork. And if you say otherwise, you don't deserve to eat potatoes...mashed or baked.

Now finish up them taters; I'm gonna go fondle my sweaters.

If I am eating say reheated mashed potatoes I will use the spoon I scooped them out with, but if I am eating mashed potatoes or a baked potato during a meal I will use a fork

1-0 every week

Really dissapointed one of you tech savy kids has not put a Neo gif in here
"There is no Spoon"

I can imagine no more rewarding a career. And any man who may be asked in this century what he did to make his life worthwhile, I think can respond with a good deal of pride and satisfaction:
“I served in the United States Navy"

KCCO

Naw that is a fictional movie. There are spoons, they are just the wrong utensil to use. There always has to be a wrong to the right.

All right. While we're still under a caution, I want you to go back out on that track and hit the pace car.

Hit the pace car?

Hit the pace car!

What for?

Because you've hit every other goddamned thing out there, I want you to be perfect!

Let's Go

HOKIES

I will use whatever utensil as at my disposal. If there is no spoon or fork but there's a knife, I will use the knife. Preference given to the fork if there's a choice.

That's the carefree lifestyle answer that I've been looking for!! Welcome brother!

I'll pour cereal in a fucking cup if I don't feel like pulling a bowl out of the dishwasher.

Neither is the correct answer. I chose SPORK!

What's
Important
Now

RTFM!

I see your spork, and raise you a:

All right. While we're still under a caution, I want you to go back out on that track and hit the pace car.

Hit the pace car?

Hit the pace car!

What for?

Because you've hit every other goddamned thing out there, I want you to be perfect!

Yeah, but can it wrench?

"Some days you’re a horse and some days you’re a horse’s ass. I’ve been a horse’s ass for a little while." - Roy Halladay

There you go. And I've used my wrench that looks just like that one to hammer many a pop up nail over the years, to respond to a way up there post.

Reel men fish on Wednesdays

I question the structural integrity of this atrocity. I've broken enough plastic forks in my day to know that whatever you thought you'd need a serrated tine for.. would be far too tough, and end up snapping the tines with little to no effort.

Is that before or after you realize you need something to hold the item being cut in place to use this atrocity to begin with.

Good point, good point. 🤔

I'll see your knork and raise you a chork!

this Ian Malcolm quote is from an entirely different scene of the movie

0/10 meme

"Why gobble gobble chumps asks such good questions, I will never know." - TheFifthFuller

Knife, Fork, Spoon, and Bottle Opener...

does the existence of this thread mean that TKP is a marital aid

"Why gobble gobble chumps asks such good questions, I will never know." - TheFifthFuller

No, it means my wife has way too much time on her hands.

"Why gobble gobble chumps asks such good questions, I will never know." - TheFifthFuller

That... and after being stuck in the black hole aka my classroom with a bunch of kindergartners all day makes for interesting if not completely random thoughts..... The children drain my brain.....

2 time Longwood grad married to a Hokie.

Just play movies for them all day and spend your time on TKP

All right. While we're still under a caution, I want you to go back out on that track and hit the pace car.

Hit the pace car?

Hit the pace car!

What for?

Because you've hit every other goddamned thing out there, I want you to be perfect!

This is how you get UVA fans

So I posed this question to my husband and after looking at me like I was an idiot for asking, he responded with fork. We are a united front on this one.

Only psychopaths use spoons.

"What kind of person would throw away a perfectly good dog?"

I actually prefer my taters fried, and to eat them without a utensil. Tater tots, french fries, potato chips.

Sometimes we live no particular way but our own

To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
@BuryHokie #ThanksFrank

There used to be a restaurant in Atlanta that served a side dish called "potatoes wonderful." I believe they made mashed potatoes and put them in a piping bag (like you use for icing cakes and stuff) and piped them into a deep fryer, sort of like a funnel cake made of potatoes. It's been 35 years and I still think about that.

"Our job as coaches is to influence young people's lives for the better in terms of fundamental skills, work ethic, and doing the right thing. Every now and again, a player actually has that effect on the coaching staff." Justin Fuente on Sam Rogers

This is sorta like what we ate in Germany as pommes frites. The gasthaus we used to frequent for brats had an "extruder" (for lack of a better word) above the fryer. The cook would pull down the handle and out would come the fry shaped potato mixture which fell straight into the hot oil. Best fries I've ever eaten, and while that was 48 years ago for me, I still think about them, too. And don't get me started on what a real bratwurst should taste like.

Reel men fish on Wednesdays

At least you knew what you were eating in that gasthaus. My dad was stationed in Germany at one point and frequented a certain gasthaus. The mother knew just enough English and they knew just enough German that they could communicate. So they went in one day and the mother wasn't there. The daughter knew English (but refused to speak). My dad and his buddy recognized one word in the menu "Bread". So they ordered that meal.... They eat and need their check. The daughter is gone and the mother comes over thinking they need to order. They tell her that the ate, but need the check. She asked what they had and they said the soup with bread. She said "Oh no. Not soup. It was, how you say, 'cow tongue and heart'. My dad said it was good until he realized what he had eaten.

2 time Longwood grad married to a Hokie.

I'm of the opinion that if it's good, it's good, regardless of what it is that's so good about it. That was one of the best things of living in Morocco and Germany in my younger days. I doubt I'd ever have tried snails at 7 years old except for the aroma of fresh french bread and garlic, butter and parsley wafting into my bunkbed from mom and dad's party. I didn't know what it was, I just knew it woke me up and I had to have it. Mom was indulgent, and without telling me what I was eating, she let me eat one, then watched me eat a dozen before she wisely cut me off. Ever since then though, I will try about anything, and if it tastes good, damn what it is, I eat it.

Reel men fish on Wednesdays

Something tells me it's not the snails that you liked . . . "garlic, butter, and parsley"

Ummm...that's what snails taste like

"Our job as coaches is to influence young people's lives for the better in terms of fundamental skills, work ethic, and doing the right thing. Every now and again, a player actually has that effect on the coaching staff." Justin Fuente on Sam Rogers

Yep, but as an adult, I came to realize that the escargot impart their own special flavor to the sauce as well. Now I'm hankering for something I cannot have. Damn.

Reel men fish on Wednesdays

That reminds me of a story my dad used to tell. He was stationed in the Phillippines when he was in the Air Force and used to frequent this little restaurant just off the base. He didn't speak a word of Tagalog so he'd just order something off the menu that looked interesting and have the waitress tell him what it was only after he'd finished his meal. Until the day she told him that the dinner he just finished enjoying was roast dog. He started asking for translations prior to ordering after that.

“You got one guy going boom, one guy going whack, and one guy not getting in the endzone.”
― John Madden (describing VT's offense?)

OK, ya got me there. I definitely wouldn't purposely eat a dog. Then again, even in Morocco, I don't recall being in a place where that would even have been a possibility. What a world, huh? But then again, people gotta eat. I guess.

Reel men fish on Wednesdays

Fork, is this a real question?

I also eat Chili with a fork, am I the only one?

Likely.

Reel men fish on Wednesdays

I eat chili with a fork if i'm not eating it with chips, which are basically food spoons. Residual in the bottom is for cornbread.

"Why gobble gobble chumps asks such good questions, I will never know." - TheFifthFuller

Fork.

#teamfork

vtnerf had an interesting comment above regarding efficiency, quoted below in part, which brings up another utensil etiquette question I've had with a family member:

As your name would suggest, you have a BS from VT. So, I would assume that you can appreciate some efficient engineering approaches. The fork would be the efficient tool for the job. I'm not eating steak and asparagus with a spoon, so I have no reason to switch utensils when potatoes are wanted in my belly. the up and down and switching would drive me insane. I use a fork for all on the plate...efficiently.

The question is this: When eating a food that needs to be cut with a knife (e.g., steak, chicken), most people put the knife in their dominant hand to cut off a piece, holding the foodstuff in place with a fork. Do you then (a) put down the knife and switch the fork to the dominant hand to place the piece of food in your mouth, (b) put the food in your mouth using the fork in your non-dominant hand to reduce unnecessary switching, or (c) cut the foodstuff into bite-sized pieces all at once, then use the fork in your dominant hand to eat.

I know my answer, I'm just interested in yours. Go.

If you're not sure if my comment warrants a "/s", it probably does.

I feel like this needs its own post. Also, I switch hands often with knife and fork when cutting meat

Yes, I switch the fork to the other hand. Which is "very American." The Euro-way is to not switch hands.
But I don't pick up a third utensil and have another bowling pin to juggle....

To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
@BuryHokie #ThanksFrank

I always used to hear a story when I was in Germany of Americans that were behind enemy lines posing as German officers in WWII whose cover was blown when they switched hands while eating. It's always the little things.

"How the ass pocket will be used, I do not know. Alls I know is, the ass pocket will be used."
- The BoD

I am right hand dominant but almost exclusively hold my fork in my left hand. For some reason it always just feels off to have my fork in my right hand. So, knife in the right (dominant) hand and fork in the left with no need to switch.

Danny Coale Caught That Ball!!!

I eat & write left handed, but everything else I can think of (batting, throwing, kicking) will be right hand dominant.

I do sometimes have an issue where I'll place things in my left pocket, and then reach for the thing later with my right hand, and need to switch. Unconscious actions requiring thought to avoid.

___

-What we do is, if we need that extra push, you know what we do? -Put it up to fully dipped? -Fully dipped. Exactly. It's dork magic.

What kind of barbarians do we have here? If you have a knife, it goes in the right hand, and you don't put it down to take a bite. You don't stab at things with the fork and sloppily shove it in your mouth. The fork is for holding something in place while you cut with a knife. If you don't need to cut anything, the knife is used as a help to get the food onto the fork.

Don't get me started on cave dwellers that cut their food with a fork.

Don't get me started on cave dwellers that cut their food with a fork.

pie.
I cut my pie with a fork.
If you cut your pie, on your plate, with a knife, you are either at a rather genteel gathering or you just need to turn in your man card.

I eat with fork in right(dominant) hand mostly. But when eating anything that requires cutting, steak for example, I switch to Euro style because I find all the switching inefficient

Doesn't matter if it's cake or pie as long as it's chocolate.

If you follow proper utensil etiquette, you should not have a spoon left for the main meal. The only utensils that would be left are the dinner fork and dinner knife. There shouldn't be anything on the dinner plate that requires a spoon.

Let's Go

HOKIES

Sweden, too.

If 7/11 off Toms Creek had one of these I would have totally been dipping taquittos in mashed potatoes at 3:30 in the morning after a night down town.

All right. While we're still under a caution, I want you to go back out on that track and hit the pace car.

Hit the pace car?

Hit the pace car!

What for?

Because you've hit every other goddamned thing out there, I want you to be perfect!

This tacquito and mashers combo sounds horrible while sober

Now at 3am after drinking?

Let's Go

HOKIES

Every have potato taquitos? Essentially taquitos filled with mashed potatoes then fried. Cheese, sour cream and taco sauce makes for a great snack, even if you hadn't been drinking.

Y'all are some closed minded mother forkers around here. Growing up, I didnt have time to use either a spoon or a fork to eat my baked potato. If I tried it would be swiped off my plate.

I learned to use my hands. Quick and efficient, less clean up as well!

"Welcome to the Terror Dome." -- Corey Moore

The debate can be solved with the following 2 questions:

Have you eaten potatoes with a spoon? Yes, when I didn't have a fork.

Have you eaten potatoes with a fork? Yes.

Well if the partys gonna be like that

Raddimus shall always be legged!!!

Danny Coale Caught That Ball!!!

"Hamdog is the kindest, bravest, warmest, most wonderful human being I've ever known in my life"....Brian Carson from the Internet(s)

Which reminds me of the saying "stick a fork in em." You notice it doesn't say "stick a spoon in em."

To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
@BuryHokie #ThanksFrank