Football Season is Right Around the Corner, Join The Key Players Club and Support TKP

Please read this.

Football season is almost here. I'm equal parts excited and relieved. Excited, because well, college football. Relieved because the Virginia Tech offseason will be put to bed. As the season inches closer, there's less coaching scandal and unexpected attrition and more goodness.

(Seriously, the preseason press conference yielded the nicknames Philthy and Philthy Phil for Phill Patterson.)

And then actual football. Most excellent.

Personally, over the last few weeks I've buried my head in preseason magazines and previews. I neglected to do that the last few offseasons, and let me tell you my Phil Steele acronym game is weak. I'm the new guy at the gym, but feel very fulfilled.

As it relates to TKP, I'm enthusiastic and eager for its upcoming coverage this season. The top-notch regular features you've read over the years are back. Slept On It, Halfwits and Wagers, film reviews, By the Advanced Numbers, and Tech Tidbits are all scheduled on TKP's content calendar. Plus, there's another recurring post in the works. Beyond that, GIFTORY, "Foe"Rensics, and more will make unexpected appearances. (Keep your eyes out next week. 👀) That is to say, the content will be good.

Below is my annual preseason update on The Key Players Club (TKPC). That was supposed to be the crux of this post before I rambled on above. As a reminder, the premise of TKPC is: If you enjoy TKP, join TKPC. It's pretty straight forward. It's what keeps the lights on around here. Now onto the numbers.

Yeah, comparative membership growth between 2018 and 2017 was not great. It was 40 to 116, respectively, a difference of -76. On the plus side, the overall churn rate of 11.24% is solid. Although, the majority of people who do leave the club, do it passively because of credit card failure, they don't actively cancel. I still don't know why that happens. My best guess is the email tied to the TKP account, which receives the failure notice and remediation instructions, is not monitored. Or perhaps it's an easier way to cancel — "fixed the glitch". In either event, solving the growth issue would yield larger dividends.

In previous posts I've mentioned the largest uptick in new members occurs on days when new content is restricted to TKPC. That will continue, and the types of articles that are made exclusive will vary. I've stopped well short of providing any other exclusive content features to TKPC members (e.g. a hidden or exclusive forum as other sites have), but it's possible there's value in that.

Out of curiosity I crunched the numbers on the number of TKPers who commented 10+ times in the last 30 days (really 2,592,000 seconds). To me those are power-ish users. 190 TKPers fall into that group and 101 are not members of TKPC (53%). Yikes! And those are TKPers interacting with the site on a regular basis. Another datapoint — according to Google Analytics, in July TKPC members accounted for only 23.77% of all site traffic.

Yeah, there's lots of room for TKPC growth.

In conclusion, if you value being able to browse to TKP each day to read original content and/or interact with the best community of Hokies, and want to ensure TKP remains online for the foreseeable future, then please consider joining The Key Players Club.

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Comments

If you can't take a little bloody nose, maybe you ought go back home and crawl under your bed. It's not safe out here. It's wondrous! With treasures to satiate desires both subtle and gross. But it's not for the timid...

Remember: when broken down, costs less than an overpriced cup of crappy Starbucks coffee a day.

#FUENTEenFUEGO
Waho's suck
Uva swallows

I don't know which TKPC you joined, but the one I joined was less than two overpriced cups of crappy Starbucks coffee a month, much less one a day. Which is fine by me, since I don't drink coffee.

BTW, I went searching for a coffee sucks gif, but found this gem. It's unrelated to the post or comment, but I figured this deserved to be shared anyways, because I might never find it again (at least not from work).

via GIPHY

The Poster Formerly Known As The Spirit Of Bernard Basham

I feel like that is not the Monday I normally have.

If you can't take a little bloody nose, maybe you ought go back home and crawl under your bed. It's not safe out here. It's wondrous! With treasures to satiate desires both subtle and gross. But it's not for the timid...

I feel like you'd definitely get you ass kicked for bitching about this kinda Monday.

"How the ass pocket will be used, I do not know. Alls I know is, the ass pocket will be used."
- The BoD

-makes joke about how a gif is NSFW
-posts on TKP anyway

Warning: this post occasionally contains strong language (which may be unsuitable for children), unusual humor (which may be unsuitable for adults), and advanced mathematics (which may be unsuitable for liberal-arts majors)..

I don't know about the gif being NSFW (okay, maybe it is). I was just commenting on the search keywords to find that gif again.

The Poster Formerly Known As The Spirit Of Bernard Basham

Your point is well supported.

___

-What we do is, if we need that extra push, you know what we do? -Put it up to fully dipped? -Fully dipped. Exactly. It's dork magic.

My friends call me Philthy Phil, too. It's a nickname I highly recommend.

Is it your porn name?

#FUENTEenFUEGO
Waho's suck
Uva swallows

More of a lifestyle...

For me, TKP is how I stay engaged and feel a part of the Hokie community and family while living in the upstate of SC. It's the best VT content on the internet in my perspective, and I would be very sad if that went away.

If you can afford it, please consider supporting TKP through The Key Player's Club. Joe and the team put a ton of their own time into providing us great content, let's make sure they can feel our appreciation for their hard work and time sacrifice.

I'm moving to the upstate around Christmas this year. Do you need any new friends?

Depending on where you'll be living/working, I'd be happy to welcome a new Hokie to the upstate.

Gonna be working on the southern side of Greenville inside the I-185 loop and living fairly near to there, whenever the real estate market directs me.

Uh oh that's on my side of town. I live less than a half mile south of the Connector just off of Augusta Rd. If you have any questions about the area or G-Vegas in general just ask.*

*Disclaimer: I grew up in Greenville and moved back here about 5 years ago.

Using /s is for cowards.

Oh boy, I'm excited. Can't wait to get up there (5 years in Columbia kinda sucks in comparison). Got 10 weeks of training coming up in the fall so I may try to intermingle myself to acclimate.

Welcome to the Upstate! There are several of us here. There's an active Alumni chapter in the area. They organize game watch parties, trips to away games, community service events, and social events throughout the year. Check them out on FB at Virginia Tech Alumni Palmetto Chapter (Greenville, SC).

"Tajh Boyd over the middle . . . and it's caught for an interception! Michael Cole, lying flat on his back, ARE YOU KIDDING???"

Well said. If I could give multiple legs for your post, I would.
TKP does have the best reporting content, fabulous analysis, and great discussion threads. If you are not a member, do yourself a favor and join! You will not regret it.

Personally I'm way to addicted to TKP for it to go anywhere.

You don't want to see what happens if I can't get my fix. Join TKPC! 🤪

Joe, you should offer a multi-user discount for TKPers who live in the same household.....

2 time Longwood grad married to a Hokie.

Not that I currently have another TKPer living in the same household, but this would be nice for the future. That said, I do plan to join TKPC, but my finances have to recover from unexpectedly purchasing season tickets and all that. Something, something, priorities.

I think the discount is you could just read the premium content over your husbands shoulder.

If you can't take a little bloody nose, maybe you ought go back home and crawl under your bed. It's not safe out here. It's wondrous! With treasures to satiate desires both subtle and gross. But it's not for the timid...

Just hand over your device with this account logged in. I am sure nothing bad could happen...

Come to Blacksburg and see what the Hokie Pokie is really all about

Sign up now!

Danny Coale Caught That Ball!!!

Random question Joe - I remember around this time last year you were pretty burned out. Your spirits seem to be a bit higher this season. What changed?

Twitter me

Warning: this post occasionally contains strong language (which may be unsuitable for children), unusual humor (which may be unsuitable for adults), and advanced mathematics (which may be unsuitable for liberal-arts majors)..

I told myself I'm not going to get stressed out and I'm going to enjoy the football season. In the past, I really stressed out aspects of coverage falling short (to my own standards). I'm not letting that happen anymore. I'm going to do the best I can with the resources I have, be happy, and enjoy the season.

877 CASH NOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

Chem PhD '16

Pain is Temporary, Chicks Dig Scars
Glory is Forever, Let's Go Hokies!!

Is it football season yet?

Decided my financial ducks are in enough of a row to finally join. About time.

Danny Coale Caught That Ball!!!

If you can't take a little bloody nose, maybe you ought go back home and crawl under your bed. It's not safe out here. It's wondrous! With treasures to satiate desires both subtle and gross. But it's not for the timid...

On a sidenote, Haley Atwell is friggin hawt. Alright. Continue.

#FUENTEenFUEGO
Waho's suck
Uva swallows

Welcome, and your handle is among my favorites on TKP. I put Old Bay on about everything.

A TKP bracket style tourney to determine the best username would be cool. User votes for round winners so we can all garden and gun the shit out of ourselves

Edit: Maybe the winner can get an official tag to remind everyone else of his/her victory

Here lies It's a Stroman Jersey I Swear, surpassed in life by no one because he intercepted it.

I like it!

The Poster Formerly Known As The Spirit Of Bernard Basham

I'm in! I'm a bit dated at this point, but still in the running...

I see what you did there. :>)

The Key Players Club anagrams to Bleakest Curly Hype, which is honestly what being a Virginia Tech football fan is like.

Chem PhD '16

I was thinking SLYLY KUT CHEAP BEER, but what the hell do you cut cheap beer with? water?

.

.

#extendbronco

I heard the acceptable answer around here is "Busch lite"

Chem PhD '16

Only to ye who be worthy. I'm actually drinking a Dos Equis at the moment. And I never pushed my beer choices on anyone, only defended myself when chastised.

If you can't take a little bloody nose, maybe you ought go back home and crawl under your bed. It's not safe out here. It's wondrous! With treasures to satiate desires both subtle and gross. But it's not for the timid...

There was a two week "episode" in my youth that included mixing 151 rum with warm beer left over from the night before more than once, but thankfully, I survived.

Reel men fish on Wednesdays

I'm pretty sure you can run a car off of that.

If you can't take a little bloody nose, maybe you ought go back home and crawl under your bed. It's not safe out here. It's wondrous! With treasures to satiate desires both subtle and gross. But it's not for the timid...

After a long recruitment process, I would like to announce my decision to join the TKPC!! I am 110% COMMITTED to their coverage of Virginia Tech University. I had offers from other places, but then the big dogs started coming in: TKP.

If you can't take a little bloody nose, maybe you ought go back home and crawl under your bed. It's not safe out here. It's wondrous! With treasures to satiate desires both subtle and gross. But it's not for the timid...


EDIT: really? You're gonna just edit it from "What for it..." to a gif of the joke you just told me to wait for?

Warning: this post occasionally contains strong language (which may be unsuitable for children), unusual humor (which may be unsuitable for adults), and advanced mathematics (which may be unsuitable for liberal-arts majors)..

Haha sorry... I was having a hard time getting the gif to work so I litterally meant wait for it.

Danny Coale Caught That Ball!!!

Welcome to the cult club.

Thank you and welcome! I'm happy I reached one person today and you enjoy TKP.

Thanks Joe! I lurked on the outside too long.

Is your last name Fuller? I'm just asking, I'm not obsessed or anything.

Nah man, HokieFan4ever is a Fuller, though.

Warning: this post occasionally contains strong language (which may be unsuitable for children), unusual humor (which may be unsuitable for adults), and advanced mathematics (which may be unsuitable for liberal-arts majors)..

I'm here to make inappropriate jokes, provide no real insight or value, and make it rain all over Joe's ass

Me and you both

via GIPHY

If you can't take a little bloody nose, maybe you ought go back home and crawl under your bed. It's not safe out here. It's wondrous! With treasures to satiate desires both subtle and gross. But it's not for the timid...

Unrelated to the topic:

The wife and I just got orders to joint base Lewis-McChord. ....just going further and further west, I guess.

I was out that way for work for a month last year. Mt. Rainier is visible from much of JB Lewis-McChord. Awesome hiking and mountain driving around there. Pretty fun little area. Should check out Oak Harbor area up north of there sometime. Gorgeous views and hiking.

Mount Ranier is gorgeous, second favorite hiking was done there Angel's Landing, Zion currently sits atop.

When I hiked Rainier I randomly saw a family of Hokies, so that was cool too!

majority of people who do leave the club, do it passively because of credit card failure, they don't actively cancel. I still don't know why that happens.

Bc they left their card at TOTS and had to get a new one.

As someone that works for a financial institution, it's shocking how often people attempt to cancel their cards as a means of getting out of paying a recurring bill. However, whenever I know that's what they're trying to do, I might forget to opt them out of the Visa Account Updater. So the merchant gets their new card info anyway.

it's shocking how often people attempt to cancel their cards as a means of getting out of paying a recurring bill.

As someone that works in collections, it ain't that shocking.

However, whenever I know that's what they're trying to do, I might forget to opt them out of the Visa Account Updater. So the merchant gets their new card info anyway.

Also, as someone that works in collections, we very much appreciate that.

#FUENTEenFUEGO
Waho's suck
Uva swallows

I probably should have added the /s to my original comment. I'm way too jaded to actually be shocked by such behavior.

I wouldn't term it "jaded", just familiar & aware (:

#FUENTEenFUEGO
Waho's suck
Uva swallows

That reminds me, mine is going to be coming up soon.... Gonna have to start buttering up the wife for an allowance boost this month....

Warning- Filter lost.

"Look at this... This is just spectacular.... These people are losing their minds"

FREE THE "STICK IT IN" CHANT!!!

It's much easier to donate to TKPC than it is to the Hokie Club. This website actually works.

Warning: this post occasionally contains strong language (which may be unsuitable for children), unusual humor (which may be unsuitable for adults), and advanced mathematics (which may be unsuitable for liberal-arts majors)..

It is hard to think what I would do at work if it didn't.

If you can't take a little bloody nose, maybe you ought go back home and crawl under your bed. It's not safe out here. It's wondrous! With treasures to satiate desires both subtle and gross. But it's not for the timid...

Get promoted

That's DEF not always a great deal.

#FUENTEenFUEGO
Waho's suck
Uva swallows

If you can't take a little bloody nose, maybe you ought go back home and crawl under your bed. It's not safe out here. It's wondrous! With treasures to satiate desires both subtle and gross. But it's not for the timid...

Just a thought Joe; I for one am a sucker for cool (and often not even that cool) schwag. Perhaps a retention incentive would be to introduce something new every year or so for members. The bottle opener is badass and I imagine it would be a major financial setback to keep forking something the equivalent to those out annually, but maybe even something cheaper like a koozie or whatever would be enough to keep people from "fixing the glitch" (watched that movie last night btw).
Sometimes physical people need a physical incentive. 😏

-all my love,
"a big fan of your work"

Maybe a a new sticker every year so I can decorate my man cave fridge. Collect em all!

No joke! I do the same thing!!

Fresh stickers are the only reason I buy the t-shirts.

___

-What we do is, if we need that extra push, you know what we do? -Put it up to fully dipped? -Fully dipped. Exactly. It's dork magic.

For those of you who have not yet become members of The Key Play, I have one word for you: JOIN!
This site has the best content from the most knowledgeable writers. They are all good, but my personal favorite is French, aka FRENCH60WASP, because of his in-depth analysis / explanation of the play of linemen. My eyes are always following the ball and I miss the vital work of the "big uglies".
The second thing I would like to say is that I really appreciate the staff monitoring the comment section. I think they do a really good job of keeping the comments civil without stifling the discussion. Anyone monitoring the cultural and political discourse of our time, knows that is not an easy task.
So if you are not a member you are missing a lot of good stuff. J O I N !

Was the original idea to charge money so that you could hire a reporter? Did that happen?

Don't really care of course.... just curious....

Unfortunately, no TKPC never got there. It was always part of the idea, really where I wanted to get to eventually. Then again when I opened the doors to TKPC, I thought it would have hit 1,000 members in a heartbeat. That's not been the case. In the meantime, I've been using the resources to double down on what we have now.

My end goal is to deliver awesome content plus website experience for all TKPers.

Moreover, given how walled off media access to the program is now, I'm not sure a traditional reporter would make sense. Things change. Back in the day (under Beamer), there were more media opportunities, open practices, and one-on-one interviews with coaches and players. That provided each member of the beat unique stories and insights. Heck, the media used to pick who they wanted to interview. Now the players and coaches address all the media at the same time. Everyone on the beat has the same quotes and stories. (Moreover, Tech publishes it all itself too. They're adept at controlling the message.)

TKP has benefited from that because it's not beholden to the beat. It wasn't born with press passes and it learned how to create original content before it could walk.

I actually reworded the text on the TKPC page to "Moreover, we want to continuously expand our coverage for you, the diehard Hokie fan." Maybe that's through a full-time beat writer, or perhaps through freelancers. Really whatever makes the most sense to deliver the best stuff Hokies want to read.

Moreover, given how walled off media access to the program is now, I'm not sure a traditional reporter would make sense. Things change. Back in the day (under Beamer), there were more media opportunities, open practices, and one-on-one interviews with coaches and players. That provided each member of the beat unique stories and insights. Heck, the media used to pick who they wanted to interview. Now the players and coaches address all the media at the same time. Everyone on the beat has the same quotes and stories. (Moreover, Tech publishes it all itself too. They're adept at controlling the message.)

Do you believe this change in dynamic has caused animosity between the coaching staff and the preeminent Hokie media outlets? I've noticed the description above is a common perspective and I'm sure it makes it more difficult for you in particular to deliver content that meets your standards.

I've noticed the description above is a common perspective and I'm sure it makes it more difficult for you in particular to deliver content that meets your standards.

I'll wager and say it's a common perspective because it's true. For TKP it's less of an issue because, as I mentioned above, TKP is not dependent on press credentials for survival. Although, more access would equal more unique articles. (We used to love publishing features on rising seniors over the summer, and haven't had the opportunity to do so over the last few years.)

Do you believe this change in dynamic has caused animosity between the coaching staff and the preeminent Hokie media outlets?

I certainly don't feel any animosity, but I can't speak to how others feel. It's Fuente's prerogative to limit access to his program. Although, I do believe less open practices, spring game not broadcast, etc... is making the program irrelevant to Hokie Nation outside of September - December. That strategy runs perpendicular with engaging and driving fan interest in order to grow the Hokie Club.

Any thoughts on whether CJF will change that approach with time? Whether it be a change in comfort level, transition from CFB, or having just his recruits, or some other reason.

I spend way, wayyy too much time on this website. Like, not a good amount of time. Not a complaint or really even a confession, just letting someone other than my wife in on this.

I comment kiiinda often, mostly on the NASCAR thread me, nick and friends keep alive throughout the season and relatively rarely elsewhere. It's not that I don't have a lot of opinions on things football related, it's just that I like to have my bad opinions play out in other folks comments (certainly during away games that I get livid during). If I feel my opinion (typically a quip or joke) can play, I'll let it rip, otherwise, I'm a paying lurker. To that, which, I feel very good about. I get to see and absorb the paying articles throughout the season and then I get to breathe and have an outlet that I otherwise would be screaming at a wall about.

Long story short, the 80 some dollars it costs, I find it worth it. Good folks doing good things, can't go wrong.

“Stats are for losers.” -Mel Kiper Jr.

Joe, I don't know if it will make you happy, but I am in Vegas with the Advanced Stats Analysis writer for WaPo and at dinner another guy asked what my hat was about. When I said it was a TKP hat, Neil jumped in and said the WaPo sports guys love your site and think you are a very intelligent guy that runs a great VT sports website.

Thanks for sharing, much appreciated. WaPo sports does a ton of excellent work.

Let's get down to business, how'd you do at the tables?

I started with a little and left with a little less. I did see one of the most incredible runs at a craps table at the Cromwell. Dude was on fire. I've never seen so many chips flipped at the shooter by other players, roll after roll.

chips flipped at the shooter

I know a little bit about craps, but what's this about?

The Poster Formerly Known As The Spirit Of Bernard Basham

This cat was coming up on every roll and winning people so much money on each roll they would throw a $10 or $20 his way after they collected their chips.

Just posting to see if I still got that sweet key

If a tree falls in Scott Stadium does it make a sound?

Just seeing what it looks like with that key beside my name for the first time

I joined partly because the content is first rate and I wanted to support a community whose outlook and sense of humor I identify with, but mostly because this site isn't blocked by the web filters at work

So I wanted to share what this site has meant to me.

I didn't go to Tech so I don't have a circle of fellow grads as automatic Tech friends. I moved out of Virginia in 2008 and haven't had any real connections to Tech except this website.

TKP has now given me people I call friends to tailgate with, shoutout Lot 18 crew. Friends to play video games with. People I talk to about being a mostly stay at home dad to a physician wife. People in the Public Safety field who have helped me with school projects. People who have offered to drive me From roanoke to a game this upcoming year. People who make my day filled with little to no adult interaction being so much better.

What Joe has created goes beyond Hokie sports or even VT. TKP is dare I say a family in a way. And TKPC is how this family pays its bills.

Wet stuff on the red stuff.

Join us in the Key Players Club

I'll try to not sound too cheesy, but this site has given me a chance to start my writing career and I'll always be grateful for that. Consider joining TKPC.

Go get it buddy. You do a great job, and I see alot of things in your future.

If you can't take a little bloody nose, maybe you ought go back home and crawl under your bed. It's not safe out here. It's wondrous! With treasures to satiate desires both subtle and gross. But it's not for the timid...

Just don't let French see you getting too cheesy.

#thingsiblamethemvsfor

well done

henceforth, please name your articles: Skuttlebutt Island

via Gfycat

Good job. Side note of good news, with you in the press box you can't throw paper airplanes.

Wet stuff on the red stuff.

Join us in the Key Players Club

well, he can, but the chances of their reaching the field go down exponentially

EDIT: you know, because of the window he'll be sitting behind. (Internet 101: if you have to explain the joke, it's not funny anymore)

Warning: this post occasionally contains strong language (which may be unsuitable for children), unusual humor (which may be unsuitable for adults), and advanced mathematics (which may be unsuitable for liberal-arts majors)..

With greater altitude comes greater horizontal travel. (Image does not take into account lifting effect from wings, of course. Give me a break, I deal in ballistics, mostly.)

The Poster Formerly Known As The Spirit Of Bernard Basham

Ballistics as in rocketry? Or ballistics as in ammunition?

Warning- Filter lost.

"Look at this... This is just spectacular.... These people are losing their minds"

FREE THE "STICK IT IN" CHANT!!!

Ballistics as in rocketry.

The Poster Formerly Known As The Spirit Of Bernard Basham

That's pretty sweet.

Although I will admit, I got really excited for a minute...

Warning- Filter lost.

"Look at this... This is just spectacular.... These people are losing their minds"

FREE THE "STICK IT IN" CHANT!!!

We have better videos than that. That was the first D5 launch, where a water spike came up and broke the actuator. They fixed that, BTW. ;^)

The Poster Formerly Known As The Spirit Of Bernard Basham

Now account for the window in front of him.

Wet stuff on the red stuff.

Join us in the Key Players Club

The Poster Formerly Known As The Spirit Of Bernard Basham

yep, I was talking about the window, but apparently the joke went over his head...like a paper airplane in lane stadium.

Warning: this post occasionally contains strong language (which may be unsuitable for children), unusual humor (which may be unsuitable for adults), and advanced mathematics (which may be unsuitable for liberal-arts majors)..

It was funny until you explained it. ;^)

The Poster Formerly Known As The Spirit Of Bernard Basham

I used to hit up the vending machine at work for soda. I'd easily spend $7 for soda every three days. I opted for buying soda in bulk from Sam's instead. The savings more than cover the cost of TKPC.

And it would be worth it just to keep this site up, but I also can't put a dollar value on articles like this

Warning: this post occasionally contains strong language (which may be unsuitable for children), unusual humor (which may be unsuitable for adults), and advanced mathematics (which may be unsuitable for liberal-arts majors)..

First post after 7ish years with a key by my name.

You successfully beat the lazy out of me.

Chick Patty w/ Cheese

Those Chick Patty w/ Cheese will get after you. Welcome back!

"What are you going to do, stab me? - Quote from Man Stabbed

Dress up a bit and get yourself an avatar.

Why would I join TKP if it isn't HTTPS secured? SMH

I just joined the Club!!! I got a question for ya - how do you feel about frilly toothpicks?

I found TKP after two rails from TOTS then walking back to my apartment and re-watching the 2012 Sugar Bowl. I woke up the next day with this username.

I'M FOR EM!

Gooood... Cause this club is FOR EM!!!

Okay, so most usernames I can figure out, but yours bothers me. I'm guessing it's something biology related?

"What are you going to do, stab me? - Quote from Man Stabbed

Not that cool - just abbreviations and other nonsense

Thank you all for your support.

Five star get after it 100 percent Juice Key-Playing. MAN

For anyone new around here, returning for football season, I thought it was appropriate to pin this to the top going into the weekend. Thank you for your support of TKP!

My credit card number got nicked AGAIN. Someone used it this morning to buy gas at a Speedway. They have canceled the card and are sending me a new one, but now I have to go figure out what is tied to it and how to change it. Joe, how do I update card info with you so I don't get another non-payment email from you in a few months? Or can I just post it on here using the "PRIVATE" feature?

Sometimes we live no particular way but our own

The PRIVATE feature works great. For instance:
[PRIVATE] Only you can read this right? So just send that credit card number on over through TKP.

"That move was slicker than a peeled onion in a bowl of snot." -Mike Burnop

The PRIVATE feature works great. For instance:
********* **** *** *** **** **** ****** ** **** **** **** ****** **** ****** ** **** ******* ****

Had no idea this was a feature, cool.

******** ******. *******! ******** *** ** ******** *? ****************************!!!!!!!!

PRIVATE Quacky. Kickbox! Cervezas for me senorita y? Antidisestablishmentarianism!!!!!!!!

Yeah Joe...appears to be some bug in the Beta version

I sent you an email "PRIVATE" feature is still in beta.

Thank you. Does that mean it does not work on the rest of the internet either?

Sometimes we live no particular way but our own

I think I now understand why your credit card was being used at a Speedway.

I was looking for a joke about this update being behind a paywall, but I'm all out of one liners. Site is still 🔥 🔥 🔥 Joe.

___

-What we do is, if we need that extra push, you know what we do? -Put it up to fully dipped? -Fully dipped. Exactly. It's dork magic.

So I am relatively new here, few weeks of having an account. I've been reading here for about a year. So baby steps. But I have an important question, what will the charge look like on my credit card? Will it say something like TKP inc.? In which case I can tell my wife it's a scientific journal, or a strip club or something. I am not sure I can sell my wife on a football site where I can argue with people over the internet.

PS I can't argue anything right now, new furnance/AC unit is being installed Tuesday. So I'm broke for a few more weeks.

I think my statement literally said THEKEYPLAY.COM

If you can't take a little bloody nose, maybe you ought go back home and crawl under your bed. It's not safe out here. It's wondrous! With treasures to satiate desires both subtle and gross. But it's not for the timid...

Yeah, that's going to take some effort.

Probably just a joke, but...

a strip club or something

Your wife would rather you go to a strip club than be on a VT athletics fansite?

"That move was slicker than a peeled onion in a bowl of snot." -Mike Burnop

Definitely a joke. Nobody uses a credit card at a strip club.

If you can't take a little bloody nose, maybe you ought go back home and crawl under your bed. It's not safe out here. It's wondrous! With treasures to satiate desires both subtle and gross. But it's not for the timid...

What about ATMs for debit cards?

"That move was slicker than a peeled onion in a bowl of snot." -Mike Burnop

I guess if you want to pay a $20 surcharge

If you can't take a little bloody nose, maybe you ought go back home and crawl under your bed. It's not safe out here. It's wondrous! With treasures to satiate desires both subtle and gross. But it's not for the timid...

Never go ATM at a strip club.

Sure, my wife would rather me be at a strip club. She doesnt want to contribute to my addictions.

Rumor has it French will live blog himself eating a small block of cheddar cheese when we reach 700 subscribers

"Some days you’re a horse and some days you’re a horse’s ass. I’ve been a horse’s ass for a little while." - Roy Halladay

Dunno, but I'd love to see a memorial video of French catching and cooking up some wahoos. We might actually be able to convince him of this one...

Hokie fan | W&M grad

The nice thing is you can use their Sperry shoelaces to floss your teeth.

#630 here. Finally. Boom.

Take the shortest route to the ball and arrive in bad humor.

For all of you fellas writing exclusive content for TKP members. Thank you and great job!

Is it football season yet?

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