Assuming the homeowners were UVA fans...
Happy Friday TKP!
Link to Post via LCAS on Facebook
From Loudoun County Animal Services:
Late one night last week, a local family heard a window breaking and strange noises in their home. They quickly called Loudoun County Sheriff's Office to report the suspicious activity. Deputies responded and found the suspect had barricaded themselves in the bathroom. The culprit in this situation was about 3 feet tall with shiny black feathers, scaly legs and a yellow beak. It was determined it would take a specialized team to extract this offender, you see, he was a wild turkey.
Humane Law Enforcement Officer Breslin responded to the call for backup and thanks to the help and teamwork of Sergeant Outlaw and Deputy Rafter from LCSO, they were able to secure the offending bird.
The rogue turkey was taken into custody, transported to and released in the front yard. We're happy to report that while the turkey did take out the entire window in the family's home, he was unhurt and quickly fled the scene to roost in a nearby tree. When asked for comment on why he had committed this crime, he responded "gobble, gobble". Officers remain unsure of the turkey's true motives, but have suspicions that he may have been planning on stealing the family's toilet paper
Comments
wow you absolutely love to see it
hiding your Wild Turkey in the bathroom may be a sign of depression. Watch for the signs and don't be afraid to ask for help.
I swear this kid looks like Sean Astin to me. All I see is a young Samwise lol
Frodo fail there HJ, but an "A" for effort.
I'm not sure what you mean. The intention wasn't to find one with Sam in it, just to find a random image that mixed the universes.
Thanos has no answer for a magic ring that makes you invisible, even if you're only three feet tall
Geeze Matt. Don't give away the only place she hasn't been looking.
You had me you sob, thought we had another thug kicker for a second lol
We just gonna roll on past the fact that Loudon County has a "Sergeant Outlaw" on the force? That's a male stripper name if I've ever heard one.
I assume that role is solely to keep Robert Duvall inline.
Jake from Brooklyn 99 would lose his minddd. "He doesn't play by the rules!"
Philadelphia has a Commissioner Outlaw.
Fun fact: when I was in basic training, our squadron had drill sergeants named Sgt Hannibal, Sgt Rotten, and Sgt Fear.
As if basic training wasn't already stressful.
Makes me think of Colonel Rhombus in Spies Like Us
1.) I love the 'shocked' expression on the turkey's face at being discovered by the authorities.
2.) What in the hell is the shiny, upside-down looking teapot thing on the floor directly beside the toilet?
3.) Why is the toilet paper roll on the floor, and so far away from the toilet, when there's an empty roll on the holder that could have easily been replaced?
And, perhaps most importantly...
4.) Why is there blood on the walls behind the edge of the sink there in the picture?
I feel like the cops were so distracted by the appearance of a random turkey in someone's bathroom, that they forgot to ask the real questions of the homeowners here.
turkey's expression is totally:
2.) What in the hell is the shiny, upside-down looking teapot thing on the floor directly beside the toilet?
Spittoon? Poor-man's bidet? There are so many disgusting possibilities.
Maybe it is where they keep their poop-knife?
+1 for poop-knife reference
It is where they store the three seashells.
It's the decanter for their Wild Turkey.
I find it strange that they are using a spotlight? Does the bathroom not have working vanity lights?
5) Did the turkey leave the residence cleaner than he found it?
By the looks of it, how could he not.
The true crime is that pathetic excuse for replacing the roll
I recently stumbled upon a thread of Youtube videos titled "tactical reloads" where it is just individuals replacing the empty roll as quickly as possible. Not quite sure why I was so impressed by it.
Imagine waking up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom and there's a wild turkey in your bathroom.
"The homeowner reports that upon finding the wild turkey in his bathroom the turkey made quick head nod upward and simply responded..."
"Sup fam"
It's too bad that the story didn't interview the homeowners....
"Officer, I was just going to the kitchen to get a white claw, and I heard this crash....and that terrible noise....gobble gobble!...I feared for my life! So I ran to the bedroom, locked the door, and called my buddy Caruthers down the street, and he told me that I should probably call the police."
Fuente has clearly lost control of the turkey pen
Man that is a disgusting toilet.
I feel like that turkey could be the TKP version of the surprised pikachu meme
Me, I'm sharpening the knife and sending Mrs. Fish to the Food Lion for stuffing. I might call my insurance agent first, I guess, but what a waste of law enforcement. It's a tough bird, I know from personal experience, but it's still just a bird.
Only pain in the ass would be catching him without getting spurred them jokers can do some damage if youre not careful. They taste awfully good in some batter in a skillet.