Here are my two best:
1)
At Tech, I had an insane roommate who decided he wanted to do some blacksmithing, and he bought this empty oil drum to cut in half to be a cover for his anvil or fire pit. Who the hell knows. He never took it out of the apartment, and he ended up bringing it into his room.
He also made brownies with xlax in them, to catch one of our other roommates eating things that weren't his. He also pranked me when I went to the Miami game. I got home from the game and he had plastered gay porn all over my room.
So payback was in the cards.
One Saturday night, he went to bed around 10/11 PM and was going get up early so he could go to a gun show.
My roommates and I broke into his room tossed some firecrackers into the oil drum and ran out.
It was insane. 20/20 hindsight we could have caught the apartment on fire, but luckily didn't. Lots of smoke, and it smelled.
He said he didn't get a wink of sleep that night.
2)
Last night we had a White Elephant gift exchange in the office. My gift of $30 value included a Toilet Golf, a People of Walmart coloring book with crayons, and a card with a lotto ticket.
So we go through the white elephant and my manager ends up with my gift solely for the lotto ticket. He scratches it off right away. He thinks he won $50 and has the person sitting next to him check the ticket again. She goes, "NO, you won $50,000!
The entire office energy was at an all-time high. Everyone is excited. People are coming up to me saying how I bought a winning lotto ticket and gave it away. I have a huge smile on my face and no one notices, they are so engulfed in him winning.
I tell the only other person in the room that knows what's going on to have him read the back of the lotto ticket to find out how he can collect his winnings.
So someone starts reading the small print on the back of the ticket. It goes something along the lines of
If you won a prize please sign and date the ticket immediately. Then take a picture of yourself with the winning ticket. Tickets of the value of $5 to $50 are completely redeemable, but anything over $50 is not, nor will it ever be redeemable. Please cherish the picture you just took of the time you thought you won the lottery!
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