An Admittedly Very Un-TKP Post

Warning, the following is not a good look for the hokie nation. It's not a good look for TKP. Quite honestly, it's not a great look for me either. This is 100% sour grapes. It comes from the depths of my severe disappointment with how the game went last night and I am, quite childishly, lashing out at the notre dame players and coaches.

So if the following offends you or makes you ashamed to be associated with me, please feel free to let the post die in the wasteland that is page 2 of the tracker. If not, feel free to join me in my tantrum.

Rex Pflueger

This douchey mcdoucherson makes me want to punch him in the face. From tackling JRob out of bounds to his stupid as tongue wagging celebration after his only 3 pointer of the night that E$PN would not stop showing. Between his douchebag haircut, being named "Rex" and overall attitude, he's earned himself an honorary basketball scholarship from LOLUVa. "Not sure how it happened. He just kinda, you know, fits in" - Tony Bennett (probably).

Matt Farrell

Short of that leprechaun in their pep band, this is the most irish looking motherfucker of the night. While his numbers looked pretty good, his biggest contribution of the night was picking a fight with Clarke, flopping, and getting Chris a technical. That said, he probably has a very bright future...complete with alcoholism, spousal abuse, and domestic terrorism against the brits.

Mike Brey

Matt Farrell in 20 years. I kid, I kid. In all seriousness, the worst thing I can say about Mike Brey is that ten years ago, he was probably that guy in Boston who would show up at your bar every month with a baseball bat and a list of demands from a guy named "Pappy"

Martinas Geben

This guy played like someone who was a late bloomer in middle school and was sick and tired of people saying he had a girl's name...Oh wait.

Austin Torres

By the end of the night, I was calling this guy "After Dark" cause his screen was always moving. Look it up kids. It's funny, I swear.

Bonzie Colson

Where do you start? Bonzie is stupid name. He was fat and our of shape last night. His play of the game was a prayer three that almost went over the backboard but somehow banked in.

TJ Gibbs Jr.

What can I say? This guy did work last night. When he wasn't making threes, he was causing us to swarm him behind the line and dishing it off for an assist. I just can't get over how one eye is looking at me and the other is making me wonder who's standing behind me as I type this.

Teddy Valentine

Much like Ryan Switzer, I don't know how Teddy has any eligibility remaining, but he certainly made some plays for Notre Dame down the stretch. Teddy Valentine sounds like a porn name. 10/10 Rhinos would swipe right.