"Foe"Rensics: Tulane or Not Tulane; The Question Is Who the Hell Is Virginia Tech Playing?

Uninformed about the history of Tulane University? Then get up to speed with this completely accurate and absolutely fact-checked history of the Green Wave.

Hello. Welcome back to a special edition of the most essential game preview column in the history of mankind. We are gathered here today because Coach Brent Pry, praise be his name (at least for now), is ahead of schedule in his complete rebuild, and the Hokies are going bowling. Virginia Tech is in search of their first winning record since 2019 and in search of their first bowl victory since Year 0.

1. Oh God, I had hoped you were dead.

A. Many people do! Be that as it may, I have time on my hands and an excess of unwarranted optimism that needs to be shared with the world. The Hokies doubled their win total from last year1! All the people we wanted to come back next year are coming back! Pry's landing dudes out of the portal that French is describing with words like "twitch" and "long arms" and "tenacious" and "cheats like hell" which might've been my favorite.

So what is the reward for this big step forward? A no-expenses paid trip to Annapolis! The illustrious Military Bowl, where, for the first time, Virginia Tech's opponent will be someone other than Cincinnati!

2. Alright, alright, so it's not quite 15-0, but you're starting to get me a little excited. Who are the Hokies playing?

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