In a stunning turn of events, Virginia Tech football did not lose last week, blessing its scarred fan base with a much-needed holiday reprieve. And this week, a well-rested, reinvigorated Hokies team led by Justin Fuente and Co. look to right the ship with a primetime matchup against...No. 3 Clemson (with a healthy Trevor Lawrence!). Thank you, ACC football scheduling gods.
Joey's Record for Pitt Week (& Season Total): 5-2 (35-28-1)
The Fifth Fuller's Record for Pitt Week (& Season Total): 6-1 (31-31-1)
Without further ado, on to the lines!
True / False: Virginia Tech quarterbacks out-rush Virginia Tech running backs
Joey: This feels like the right place to bid adieu to the fan-favorite, bulldozing quarterback known around these parts as QP4. Patterson, who announced his intent to transfer on Monday, will no doubt be missed in Blacksburg, but rest assured that Brad Cornelsen spent the entire bye week devising ways to scheme up 3rd-and-long QB draws for a now healthy Braxton Burmeister.
Fuente said QB Braxton Burmeister is healed up. He broke three toes in practice a few weeks ago. "He smashed the snot out of them," Fuente said. #Hokies— Andy Bitter (@AndyBitterVT) November 30, 2020
As an aside, does it feel strange to anyone else that we found out about 3 broken toes on the Hokies' season-opener starter at quarterback only after they had fully healed? Tech football in 2020, I suppose...
Back to the matter at hand, I like the slimmed down quarterback room in this one. Clemson figures to load up against the run and dare Hendon Hooker to beat them through the air, which means a whole lot of prayers go-routes to Tre Turner and plenty of QB keepers in the run game for Hooker.
The Fifth Fuller: Alas, poor Quincy, you threw fades well. Do you remember how excited we all were when QP4 committed and knew that he was the future of the program? No...no, you're thinking of Dematrius Davis. Uh...no, that was Dwayne Lawson. No, that was Jerod Evans. Man, there sure have been some problems convincing quarterbacks to stick around Blacksburg, or even getting them there in the first place. Apparently Fuente was playing 6 dimensional chess and expected this move ALL ALONG, which is apparent because the QB pipeline after Hooker is STACKED with...Knox Kadum. And verbal commit Tahj Bullock, who will get here the year after Hooker leaves, the ideal situation for transitioning from one quarterback to another. Everything's fine!
Anyway, I feel like it's been long enough for Khalil Herbert's hamstring to have healed, so I fully expect lots of QB keepers and Raheem Blackshear sightings and JET SWEEPS! Honestly, I doubt that anything Tech does will work very effectively, so I'm going to bet on the most talented guy in the backfield and say Herbert is going to lead the RBs to more yards than the QBs. Now, that may be 13 yards against -7, but that over/under is a different conversation.
Most Receiving Yards: Tre Turner or the Field
Joey: After a brief (rumored) flirtation with the transfer portal / opting out and waiting for a competent offensive staff (and really, who could blame him?), Tre Turner is apparently sticking with the Hokies for another week. And while the real line may actually be whether Turner suits up against UVA after what figures to be a Clemson bloodbath, I do think he'll continue his strong rapport with Hooker and lead the Hokies in receiving once again.
For the record, yes, Tre plays against UVA, but only because he's still pissed about last year. Then he'll take one last PBR chug from the Commonwealth Cup, pack his shit up, and go somewhere with a passing scheme more sophisticated than the Little Giants.
The Fifth Fuller: Oy. Clemson doesn't have quite the intimidating pass defense that you'd expect, but as Joey will cover in the next line, a lot of teams ain't exactly facing the number ones at the end of the game. So it's somewhat tempting to take the field here, because even the teams that are getting smoked will throw in their backups to get game experience once things get out of hand. Then I remembered Hooker running QB sneaks while the Hokies were up big on BC late and realized that Cornelsen will probably be running Turner on crossing routes straight into a Herbstreit kid dropping a highlight reel hit on him while time is expiring on a 47-point blowout. So, let's go with Turner.
Over / Under: 0.5 Fourth Quarter Snaps for Trevor Lawrence
Joey: So, I've crunched the numbers. Trevor Lawrence has only played in 3 of 7 fourth quarters this season (in games which he appeared), ironically about the same rate (~43%) at which Virginia Tech wins football games (~44%). Squaring off with an embattled defense that future Virginia Tech head football coach Clemson offensive
coordinator Tony Elliot described as "all over the place", I think Lawrence can probably head downtown, get himself a second half rail, catch the last 15 minutes from TOTS, and be nice and lathered up for "I'm Proud To Be An American" at midnight. Under.
The Fifth Fuller: I really stressed over this one; the Hokies could definitely put up a fight and, if not put the brakes on the Clemson offense, at least put a governor on them to slow it down somewhat. Keeping it close this long seemed truly obtainable. Then I re-read the line and realized it said 4th quarter, not 3rd, and lol, they're dropping that kid in a bucket of ice before the tuba players do the Hokie Pokie. Wait, is that still a thing this season? Under.
Over / Under: 500 yards of Total Offense for Clemson
Joey: Well, not to be a simpleton, but seeing as Clemson just racked up 581 yards of offense against Pitt (who, in case you've forgotten, recently beat Tech by 33), I like the over here.
To be fair, I do think the bye week will help Justin Hamilton and his unit self-scout and get some juice back in their legs...but it's insanely bad timing to get Clemson. Sorry, J-Ham.
The Fifth Fuller: Part of me remembers the Hokies being competitive with Miami down to the wire and thinks, hey, they might rise to the occasion. Then I checked, and Miami got pwned by Clemson by 25. And Tech gave up 466 yards of total offense to Liberty. Joey has confidence in J-Ham that I am not quite able to muster, the only way I see this staying low is if they blow the doors off so early that their foot is off the gas by halftime. Over.
Dealer's Choice: Name Tech's Uniform Combo
Joey: As this website's preeminent source for nailing uniform predictions, I see two main options for the Hokies' nationally televised tussle with Dabo:
- All Maroon Everything. This is the bold (or perhaps downright foolish) pick that would likely dig #AME's grave a few feet deeper, but damn they would look good doing it.
- Maroon-Maroon-White. The traditional, conservative, "let's get this over with" pick, otherwise known as the wise man's choice.
Ultimately, I think this comes down to who gets final say and/or veto power over uniform selections. If it's a players-only decision, I think they roll the dice and go all-maroon. If Fuente has a say, I'd imagine his agent's personal preference is to make as little noise as possible before exiting stage left later this month. I'll ride with the latter. Maroon-Maroon-White.
The Fifth Fuller: I have done a lot of uniform history research, and I'm a patterns guy. The last four times the Hokies have lost to played Clemson, they've gone solid colors, the All Whites or #AME. They try to get hyped up for Clemson, which, sadly, has not worked since Macho Harris was wrecking shop in Death Valley. They're going to be getting pantsed playing on NATIONAL TELEVISION, the ABC Saturday night game! Out there STYLIN. I have never seen a more obviously bad All Maroon Everything call, which means they're definitely not going to do it. Eff it, just do it and be legends. #AME FTW!
Disclaimer: This column was written on Wednesday evening, prior to the official uniform release on social media (obviously).
The Joey Coogan Memorial "Navy Hits the Over" Lock of the Week
Joey: I'm torn this week between the Wisconsin/Indiana Under 45.5 (backup quarterback for Indiana, two good defenses, Big Ten football weather, etc.) and the Tulsa/Navy Over 49.5. But with this pick's title in mind, I think I have to go Navy. The Midshipmen may not score much themselves, but No. 24 Tulsa has averaged nearly 34 points per game over their last 5 (all victories), and figures to surpass that number against Navy's sieve of a defense. (And yes, I'm aware Navy only gave up a ten spot last week against Memphis, but they can't possibly be good two weeks in a row!)
Separately, picking Navy was my shameless excuse to work in the awesome uniforms they're sporting for Army/Navy next week, the unquestioned No. 1 spectacle in college football (and probably sports in general).
175 years of history, tradition, and honor all lead to this.The 2020 Army-Navy Uniform#BeatArmy | #BuiltDifferent pic.twitter.com/Ffc5SIkeAZ— Navy Football (@NavyFB) December 1, 2020
The Fifth Fuller: Since Joey stole Bedlam from me last time out, I went looking for the Pokes and this week's line didn't disappoint. I don't know if the bookies are overly focused on the Frogs winning last week 59-23, but that was against Kansas, who has been making the old Big East Temple and Rutgers teams look like the 85 Bears. TCU has been losing to teams they should lose to and beating the teams they should beat. They should lose to the Fightin T Boone Pickens', and by more than 2.5. Take Okie State this week.
Spread: Clemson -22
Joey: You're probably tired of hearing me say this after an excruciating month of Hokie football, but I don't understand this line. I mean, Clemson comes in fresh off a 35-point shellacking of Pitt, a game that was quite literally never in doubt after Trevor Lawrence and Co. rattled off 31 points in the first quarter. Keep in mind, all this occurred in a game that Clemson was favored by 24, somehow two points more than Tech is getting on Saturday night. So yeah, I'm at a loss for words as to why Vegas seemingly continues to respect this football team.
That said, I'm certainly not above profiting from it. Clemson -22.
The Fifth Fuller: This weekend feels like it's going to be the nadir of Hokie football while I've been around. And I've been around for some doozies. 1998, with Temple, the Donovan McNabb game and the UVA comeback. The Matt Ryan game. The Georgia Peach Bowl. JMU. ODU. Liberty. IT WAS A CATCH. All of those were painful in particular ways, but mostly because the Hokies were competitive and, in many cases, SHOULD have won. Then there's another category, that unfortunately is becoming more prevalent recently. The LSU beatdown in 2007 always comes to mind, but over the last few years, it's transitioned to getting pounded by conference foes. Losing to Pitt by 30. Losing to DUKE at HOME by 35. Two weeks ago against Pitt. AGAIN. Those were games that the Hokies looked like they had no business being on the same field as their opponent. I am worried that the Hokies aren't even going to give Clemson enough trouble to get Brent Venable's Pullback Guy some work. I am very concerned that things are going to bottom out Saturday night. And it sucks to see your opponent favored by 22 and wonder why it's so low. Go Hokies, but bet on Clemson.
Disclaimer: Some of these are real betting lines, but many of them are fake and none of this is real advice that should be taken seriously.
Comments
yeaahhh. This is shaping up to be a "turn it on once the kids are down and miss the first few minutes/Clemson scores. Turn it off and go to sleep pissed at the end of the first half" type of game.
my thoughts exactly
You have to go into this game with the right expectations. Hamilton's cover-4 soft zone is like standing in front of a firing squad directed by Trevor Lawrence. Please pick me off at will. Please yell "fire" and watch us go down. Oh, yes, he will do a cover three blitz once in a blue moon, and that will reduce the pocket time for Lawrence from 10 seconds down to 9. Now mind you, we still have that Bud Foster 4-down gap-penetrating defensive line that now steps on its own feet (DE's are the exception maybe?). And lest you think this is a brilliant bend-but-not-break plan by Hamilton, you are wrong again. Hamilton has a novel strategy: he believes in both bending and breaking at the same time. Hamilton's brilliant defensive strategy that worked so well for Pitt has a name: it's called the Gumby defense.
If you go into it with the right expectations, you will not be disappointed.
I'm going to be relegated to watching the bachelor (maybe it's bachelorette?...can't keep up) with my wife after the first quarter...there's no way I'm going to convince her to keep watching the game once Clemson is up 3 scores
You gotta take the long view here. A lot more likely the night goes well if you watch her show instead of the game. No disrespect to your wife. Just good husbanding strategy.
Or take the short term view, if you watch her show you can transition that husband-wife time into Husband-Wife 😘 time, if you know what I mean.
You can watch the game later.
I'd say record it but why waste HD space?
this is assuming HH leaves after this season
Ah, I was calendaring wrong. 2020 recruits are already here, 2021 will show up next year. You right. Man, first wrong thing I've ever said on this website.
You should add Over / Under: 1 clemson punt.
This is gonna be bad...I think Dabo keeps the pedal to the floor, trying to get trevor back to the top of the heisman rankings.
Of course, with the weather, who knows...sounds like conditions will not be great for QB's.
I'll slap that under. If I win, sweet, I guessed right. If I lose, sweet we got a defensive stop!
I'm tired of being negative so I'm not going to say the majority of things that I want to right now.
Lets focus on the unis - lets just go bonkers. I'm not talking O/M/M or any of our more likely color combos. Seeing South Florida this past week make me want to go neon orange with reflective piping all over the helmets, unis, and shoes. If nothing else it will be entertaining to see how the broadcast responds to all the extra visual noise on the field.
Low key hoping that the newly announced BYU-Coastal game takes over the ABC primetime slot instead of our game.
Well, if we could get the game bumped from ABC, I might be able to see it. Apparently, Directv is in a war with one of its providers and our ABC feed is currently "unavailable" as they measure dicks and trash talk each other. "Don't call us" seems to be the only thing we can get from Directv.
PLEA FOR HELP!!!!!
Any suggestions as to how I can get the game would be greatly appreciated. Win, lose or draw, I just don't miss the Hokie games and it's been a while since I was forced to listen to it on the radio. While I can't afford to add a service just for this game, I might be forced to consider drastic measures, if they are available for less than the price of a new car.
If you have any cable service running to your house (doesn't have to be active, just need the line there), you can plug the coax directly from the wall into the back of your TV to get Over The Air channels. They can't block/charge you to deliver those. At least, that's how it used to work; we used to have FiOS, but cancelled and could still watch broadcast channels. Now we have Hulu and they include them all anyway.
Also, maybe try to watch it online using WatchESPN? I'm wondering if they're smart enough to block it there, but again, I didn't think they were able to block you from accessing OTA channels.
They can't block over the air but they do now require a digital antenna (which are like $20-30 and look like a plastic sheet of paper you stick to your wall). I haven't tried the coax hookup though to see if that works for OTA.
Oh, that's a good qualifier. Your TV has to have a digital tuner in it for this to work. I think every TV made after 2007 has one, so as long as your TV isn't older than that, it shouldn't affect things.
No cable to house and our wifi just doesn't support the ESPN feed, which our package includes, but it just isn't watchable. Between pixillation during motion and freezing up more than not, I've given up until broadband is available here.
To reference comments below, my tv is a year old, but I don't have an antenna set up. I'll look into them to see if it's worth it to get one. I guess the old bicycle wheel and tinfoil doesn't work anymore, huh?
I don't know if Hulu will give me the live tv stuff for free, and even then, I can't be certain that they will be able to give me ABC. What I've read says they don't in certain markets. Used to be so easy to just hop on the phone and call a company and talk to someone without having to bring a book and a beer and be ready to listen to a half hour or more of repetitive, poorly recorded music.
Thanks to one and all for the help.
I believe I've got it figured out. Free trial of youtube looks like it'll fill the bill, unless they're having the same issues as directv. Little more investigating to do, but I believe that's my best option right now. I'll likely get one of those antennas, as mentioned above, they are pretty cheap, but for just this one game, I think I'll go with free.
Edit: Got lucky for another avenue when I found an antenna at the local hardware store. Only has a 55 mile radius, and I'm kinda in the middle of nowhere here, so it may not work. Thing is, when Directv get's straight with their provider, I'll have little or no use for that antenna. I figure I'll try it out, keep it the weekend, and take it back on Monday, which is what the salesperson suggested. It may or may not get the game, but it also affords me an idea of what's available. I'll only feel a little guilty.
You should be able to get the ABC station to the south from there I would think but digital antenna is the way to go for the cheapest option
Wasn't it Fuente's second year here where we stopped kicking field goals and going for it in bizarre situations on 4th downs, only to find out late in the season it was because our field goal kicker was injured?
I'm surprised we didn't learn about it in quarter 3 of the Clemson game, when we're down by 24 and HH gets the piss knocked out of him during an attempt to convert a 3rd-and-9. BB comes in only to look rusty and not comfortable in the pocket and the lead ballons to 34 by the end of the game. In the post-game presser, Fuente reveals the news that BB had broken his toes early in the season, which healed in time for Clemson, but all that missed time meant lack of practice and development, hence not Fuente's fault at all.
As a side note, interesting how alliterative our quarterbacks names are/have been:
It's like someone put Stan Lee in charge of naming our QB Room.
"and be nice and lathered up for "I'm Proud To Be An American" at midnight. Under." Wait, is this a thing at TOTS? Is it new? Or have i just been successfully avoiding spending any more time there than strictly necessary?
Anyways, this article got me thinking...this might be the first game I can remember where I truly believe we have no shot at winning. Zero. Notre Dame 2018 was a long shot but you could see path (and so could the team up till halftime). Clemson 2017 my maroon and orange glass informed me that the home field advantage may be able to work it's magic. 2015 Ohio State was riding high from the previous year's upset. Those Bama games were pre-BAMA and near our peak. Even LSU 2007, I wasn't following close enough to be worried about such things, but every year felt just a couple of breaks from a championship. So yeah, this might be the first game in the bowl era where the Hokies literally have no shot against a top team. That's as damning a reality as I can think of.
I went to Tech from '12 - '16 and it was definitely a thing then (or I was just imagining it after a few too many rails).
Becoming incredibly patriotic while drunk is nothing to be ashamed of.
Couldn't tell ya... I can count on one hand the # of times I was at Tots during my undergrad years. I didn't learn about rails until mid-way through my senior year, and i didn't/wasn't able to hang around to midnight that evening.
Bama is -29.5 vs LSU...
Man this year is really something.
DO I KNOW UNIFORMS, OR DO I KNOW UNIFORMS?
This is a little too coincidental. I think we need an independent investigation to see if Shane is slipping Joey the uniform combos Wednesday mornings.
Could not agree more. This is a conspiracy. Any former mayors of NYC available to do some solid investigative work?
This week would seem to be the ideal week to break out the much-hated Orange jerseys.
We can blame our resounding defeat on the curse of the orange.
And possible side-benefit..maybe can confuse Lawrence and bait him into an INT or two.
What would happen if TL was sitting on the sidelines before the second quarter, as in he was injured?
We'd get blown out by slightly less.