Prime Minister...I mean Fuller Question Time

Hey, you guys asked lots of great questions last week! At least, you asked me questions that allowed me to rant about Family Feud and sandwiches, which keeps me from annoying my wife about these things. She wants us to do it again! It's a good way to kill time until our favorite team takes the court against Ball State. Put all your burning questions, football related or not, in the comments, and I'll make some more shit up.

DISCLAIMER: Forum topics may not have been written or edited by The Key Play staff.

Comments

Where exactly is the line drawn between what is considered art and not art?

"What kind of person would throw away a perfectly good dog?"

Why did anyone think Dane Cook was funny?

Here here

Five star get after it 100 percent Juice Key-Playing. MAN

I was young, not afraid to admit it.

Yep. Teenage highlander thought Vicious Circle was the funniest thing he'd ever seen.

Amateur superstar and idiot extraordinaire.

I remember seeing a Dane Cook special at a small club or something - i think it was his first show - and he was HILARIOUS. After that it all went downhill.

End the debate once and for all - is Die Hard a Christmas movie or is it not?

It is. Ho, Ho, Ho.

Five star get after it 100 percent Juice Key-Playing. MAN

Which is the better VT sports mantra? Fuente's Going 1-0 this week or Buzz's #GetBetter?

Here lies It's a Stroman Jersey I Swear, surpassed in life by no one because he intercepted it.

1-0 because I like winning. Get better doesn't mean you win.

#Let's Go - Hokies

Is a hot dog a sandwich?

We put the K in Kwality

Hot Take: Hot dogs are a hybrid between sandwiches and tacos. Sandwiches need to be side opening. Top opening foods are more vehicles than anything else.

Outspoken team cake advocate. Hates terrapins. Resident Macho Man Gif Poster. Distant cousin to Dork Magic. Frequently misspells words.

Is a sub/hoagie... a sandwich?

#Let's Go - Hokies

What three items would you buy at Walmart if the single, overarching goal of the transaction was to creep out the cashier?

"Why gobble gobble chumps asks such good questions, I will never know." - TheFifthFuller

large quantities of cheap towels

Five star get after it 100 percent Juice Key-Playing. MAN

Towels, bleach, and a set of kitchen knives.

"Yes I am going to have favorites. My favorites are high production and low maintenance players, coaches, and staff." - JMFF

two cans of chilli beans and a pack of toilet paper

I seldom speak to loluva grads, but when I do, I tell them I want large fries.

A scented candle, a large cucumber, and a pack of condoms.

A scented candle, a large durian, a tub of vasoline.

The durian alone should be enough.

Big bottle of stool softener, bottle of colon cleanse, and a turkey baster

uva - the taint of the ACC
Callused perineum is a symptom of being a uva fan

McGruber, is that you?

A wooden baseball bat, a large box of nails, and roller skates

Class of '02. GO HOKIES!

You can take one player from each of the teams we lost to and add them to our roster. Who do you choose?

Notre Dame: Jerry Tillery
Old Dominion: Jonathan Duhart
Georgia Tech: Anree Saint-Amour
Boston College: Zach Allen
Pitt: George Aston

Five star get after it 100 percent Juice Key-Playing. MAN

Any QBs or RBs?

Onward and upward

Aston is a RB. Ran for a TD vs us.

You said one. RB would be the next pick from Pitt. BC would be 2nd or 3rd (I liked their LB.)

Five star get after it 100 percent Juice Key-Playing. MAN

Spring game: Mook Reynolds

Top 5 movies

Most random VT football and basketball player you can think of

Purnell Sturdivant

Five star get after it 100 percent Juice Key-Playing. MAN

What makes them random?

Benny Wolfe.

Idk, it's pretty subjective. I like to think of it as hitting the sweet spot of someone obscure enough that you probably haven't thought of them in years but also impactful enough that you're like, " oh yeah I remember them they were kinda good". Or just a funny name.

Nice dude, good special teamer

Five star get after it 100 percent Juice Key-Playing. MAN

Basketball: Jeff King
Football: Devin Wilson

Carlis Parker and Victor Davila

Jahree Cheeseman

uva - the taint of the ACC
Callused perineum is a symptom of being a uva fan

Cartoons Plural

We put the K in Kwality

FB: Cory Price
BB: Nigel Munson

21st century QBs Undefeated vs UVA:
MV7, MV5, LT3, Grant Wells, Braxton Burmeister, Ryan Willis, Josh Jackson, Jerod Evans, Michael Brewer, Tyrod Taylor, Sean Glennon, and Grant Noel. That's right, UVA. You couldn't beat Grant Noel.

Football: Ben Taylor
Basketball: Ace Custis

I wish I still had the Ace Custis poster that hung in my boyhood room for awhile.

FB: George George
BB: Bimbo Coles

"Nope, launch him into the sun and fart on him on the way up"
-gobble gobble chumps

"11-0, bro"
-Hunter Carpenter (probably)

Dustin Pickle
Alvaro Tor

I loved the pickle. Dude was a hell of a special teamer.

Amateur superstar and idiot extraordinaire.

Football: Kalvin Cline
Basketball: Lewis Witcher

"What kind of person would throw away a perfectly good dog?"

FB: Rosco Coles
BB: Dale Soloman

I seldom speak to loluva grads, but when I do, I tell them I want large fries.

FB: Bart McMillan
BB: Robert Krabbendam

Best place to set up for a zombie apocalypse and why?

What are the top five shittiest movies besides Top Gun and Home Alone that all the people tell you are good?

Five star get after it 100 percent Juice Key-Playing. MAN

1) The Shape of Water.

We put the K in Kwality

Now you don't like Home Alone? Geezum

I love a good nap. Sometimes that's all that's getting me out of bed in the morning.

Leg for "geezum" because before you said that I thought my fiancé's Dad was the only human in the world that knew that word.

"What kind of person would throw away a perfectly good dog?"

Forrest Gump

Top Gun
Alien vs Predator
Ghost Ship
Coyote Ugly
Bullworth

I know you said "besides Top Gun" but it sucks so much it has to be on everybody's list

uva - the taint of the ACC
Callused perineum is a symptom of being a uva fan

Here here

Five star get after it 100 percent Juice Key-Playing. MAN

"Hey French!"

"What kind of person would throw away a perfectly good dog?"

if all of the Fullers got together to play football (or any REAL sport) against an loluva "all star" team, how badly would the Fullers beat them?

What player on the team is the most likely to go pro in a different sport?

Outspoken team cake advocate. Hates terrapins. Resident Macho Man Gif Poster. Distant cousin to Dork Magic. Frequently misspells words.

Bradburn

We put the K in Kwality

QP, Engineering

"Yes I am going to have favorites. My favorites are high production and low maintenance players, coaches, and staff." - JMFF

Which of French's non football related opinions is the worst and why is it his disdain of cheese?

Using /s is for cowards.

"Hey, that milk has gone bad. We should pour it on this potato."- The inventor of cheese

Yuck.

Five star get after it 100 percent Juice Key-Playing. MAN

"Hey this juice from this fruit has gone bad. Let's let it get even older and then drink it once it burns our throats." - The inventor of alcohol

I take it you hate booze too? 😜

Using /s is for cowards.

Dunno if he hates it, but I think French has said a few times that he doesn't drink.

No, I *don't* want to go to the SEC. Why do you ask?

We don't love dem Hoos.

If you were using that argument to oppose sour cream, I'd be with you. I mean, it says it right there on the label... IT'S GONE SOUR!!! Why anyone wants to eat that nasty slime is beyond me. But cheese is frickin awesome, man.

“You got one guy going boom, one guy going whack, and one guy not getting in the endzone.”
― John Madden (describing VT's offense?)

Guinness from a glass bottle or a can? You don't have anything else to pour into. Which do you take and why?

Onward and upward

I'm just here to ask for a mini foerensics on our next big opponent Ball State. While I've never visited, I have heard good things about this state as a whole. Can you confirm and/or provide a brief history?

If not, I really just want some more food reviews. Thanks,

What is the most times you have pooped in the grocery store restroom in one day?

Five star get after it 100 percent Juice Key-Playing. MAN

What is worse, naming your team after a thing that destroys your campus every time it comes to town or naming your team after a thing you eat during your football contests?

Plan for the worst and hope for the best, not the other way around.

Follow up, should a Golden Hurricane be more or less feared than a regular hurricane?

Plan for the worst and hope for the best, not the other way around.

Depends on whether or not the Golden Hurricane is taking place inside of a Russian hotel suite.

If you play it, they will win.

"How the ass pocket will be used, I do not know. Alls I know is, the ass pocket will be used." -The BoD

Is a golden hurricane just code for a golden shower by multiple showerheads?

uva - the taint of the ACC
Callused perineum is a symptom of being a uva fan

When are they finally going to air the TRUE "Fuller House"?
And where are you in this photo?

FOSTERS: Australian for defense

Will this incarnation of Fuller House include a cameo by the Ashley-Kate, Mary, and Greg Olsen triplets?

I believe he is taking the photo in this photo.

Plan for the worst and hope for the best, not the other way around.

What coach and what team besides UVA do you hate the most? Football and basketball

Compare this years team to one item on the menu at Dietrick

uva - the taint of the ACC
Callused perineum is a symptom of being a uva fan

I can answer this.....Scrod...... circa 1987 when i was there......uuugggghhhh.

My wife takes the kids and leaves the house while I watch my Hokie games.........nuff said

Why do you have to mention the cursed fish? Four years of Shultz scrod nearly was the death of every cadet on upper quad.

VTCC '86 Delta Co., Peru Hokie, Former Naval Aviator, Former FBISA, Forever married to my VT87 girl. Go VT!

Is Hilgart helping with Shibest's fupa reduction?

uva - the taint of the ACC
Callused perineum is a symptom of being a uva fan

Buckminster Fuller?

All of a sudden, I found myself in love with the world
So there was only one thing that I could do
Was ding a ding, dang my dang a long ling long....

Why does Numb have over 1 billion views?

Ask me no questions, and I'll tell you no lies

Oldie but goodie.

Outspoken team cake advocate. Hates terrapins. Resident Macho Man Gif Poster. Distant cousin to Dork Magic. Frequently misspells words.

What food should be added to the Lane Stadium snack bars (outside of alcohol)?

You have one Hokie that's been granted 3 games of eligibility to come back and play (they are in the same physical condition as their previous year in orange & maroon), does Mike Vick score more on the ground or through the air?

A decade on TKP and it's been time well spent.

True or false there is a direct correlation between the posting of "foe" rensics and the Hokies performance on the field?

I can imagine no more rewarding a career. And any man who may be asked in this century what he did to make his life worthwhile, I think can respond with a good deal of pride and satisfaction:
“I served in the United States Navy"

Ozark or Man in the High Castle?

"Take care of the little things and the big things will come."

Should my boyfriend bring a UMBC shirt as a dirty Santa gift for his first Christmas with my family where 40% of the grandkids graduated from UVA?

He should bring a UMBC shirt, hat, and Christmas tree ornament 🎅🎄🎁

2 time Longwood grad married to a Hokie.

Maybe a picture of the final score of the game in a really nice frame?

I might want that for myself 😂

A must have for every Hokie with LOLUVA fans/alumni in their family

Why do people say an alarm is going off if it is actually turning on?

Why can you get off on something, but it also turns you on? English weirds words.

Warning: this post occasionally contains strong language (which may be unsuitable for children), unusual humor (which may be unsuitable for adults), and advanced mathematics (which may be unsuitable for liberal-arts majors)..

That's the same thing - only different

uva - the taint of the ACC
Callused perineum is a symptom of being a uva fan

Why does your nose run and your feet smell?

"The Big Ten is always using excuses to cancel games with us. First Wisconsin. Then Wisconsin. After that, Wisconsin. The subsequent cancellation with Wisconsin comes to mind too. Now Penn State. What's next? Wisconsin?" -HorseOnATreadmill

Why do we park on a driveway and drive on a parkway?

From the 2018 VT-uva game-"This is when LEGENDS are made!"

I love a good nap. Sometimes that's all that's getting me out of bed in the morning.

Why do you drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?

We put the K in Kwality

What's the deal with driving on a parkway and parking in a driveway?

Warning: this post occasionally contains strong language (which may be unsuitable for children), unusual humor (which may be unsuitable for adults), and advanced mathematics (which may be unsuitable for liberal-arts majors)..

I was actually replying to it...that was the joke.

We put the K in Kwality

The bigger question is: why don't chicken breasts have nipples?

uva - the taint of the ACC
Callused perineum is a symptom of being a uva fan

How did our politics get so fucked up?

Onward and upward

"What kind of person would throw away a perfectly good dog?"

I get it, this isn't a place to talk politics. But if anyone, and I mean ANYONE, can make some good light humor out of our political climate that is still somehow appropriate for TKP, its TheFifthFuller

Onward and upward

Meh, someone would still get butthurt and a shitstorm would follow. Best to just back away.

If you play it, they will win.

"How the ass pocket will be used, I do not know. Alls I know is, the ass pocket will be used." -The BoD

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop?